Why do we find new things from being cc'd??

2 minute read time.

Ok, so we have had appointments with consultants and specialists etc. but the lung specialist decided to write to dad's doctor and copied us in.  There it is in black and white.  Bowel CANCER, lung CANCER, liver mets blah blah blah, ok hard to swallow but we got over that.  Today we've been cc'd again and this time it talks about the chemotherapy he's about to receive, ok and the radiotherapy for his bone mets, no one has ever mentioned radiotherapy to us!  And it also gives a grading on the lung cancer too, has no-one thought to tell us this????  Is this normal??

We went out for dinner tonight, a couple of drinks and nice food before 'everything changes' my earlier blog.... so dad says his incapacity benefit application has been accepted and it's been increased due to him needing a carer.  He says he feels fraudulent, he's ok, mum said it seems odd that he needs that, will he get that bad.  I replied yes he probably will, dad probably won't get over this mum, then mum cries, she thought he would just be ok in the end....

So they moved to Spain, after owning a property for 7 years, dad's business folded 2 years ago so why the hell not right???  Rented out their property, 6 month lease ending on 23rd August.  All ok right???  I rang the agent to say we will not be renewing the lease, conversations about legally 2 months notice, push to September, talking to tenant, 70 year old waiting for a heart bypass, eek, says his operation is mid September and they haven't found anywhere they like so it'll be mid December before they can move!!  So dad is upset and mum cries more.  Geez when does a tenant have a right to say WHEN they are ready to move out????  I explained that them staying beyond the 2 months notice is NOT an option (they know dad's situation) but clearly they do not care.  I am sympathetic to their situation but dad is more important, what do I do???  Dad's 6 cycles of chemo takes him to November IF he makes them all, so where does that leave them, living in my spare room with no kitchen cupboard space for their things, no wardrobe space, living out of a suitcase.  OMG how do we all cope with this. Nothing is ever easy but this is just taking the P I FF.  I mean a bowel cancer, bummer, and lung, OMG, not getting back in their home bleeping priceless. If Carlsberg could do screw ups.......

 

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi again MollyB

    Hope your dad's chemo went well today - what did he have?

    I know what you mean about not knowing everything, but I think they try not to overload us with too much info at one time - because it's such a lot to take in.  I find myself asking some of the same questions more than once because I constantly want to check my understanding, and I do tend to refer to the Mac cancer pages because they're a really good source of information, and they explain it all really well.  Each cancer is so different, as are the people living with it, so we're never going to know everything, but keep asking all the questions you need to, because it helps to regain some feeling of control.

    Did you find out about the RT and what they were aiming it at - and to what purpose?  I'm hoping, if the chemo works for me, that they might be able to do some RT on my chest to shrink the lung tumours a bit more.  But I know they also use it on mets for symptom relief, particularly for pain on bone mets.

    Hope you got some of the answers you were looking for today.

    Take care

    Ann X

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Molly,

    hope you manage to get some time to de-stress yourself, I am finding alot of parallels of your experience to my own so I am following your blog, as your posts and posts of others replying to you help me to understand my mums illness more.

    Sending you and your family hugs and best wishes

    Helen x