Hi everyone, is there anyone out there connected to someone who has or dare I say had secondary breast cancer. My mum was diagnosed in 2007 first time nearly 18 years ago now in her lungs,ribs and skull. After being on hormone treatment for the last year now time for chemo which she started on the 15th Jan. All the books I read say there is usually no cure just treatment keeps it under control. Think what i'm trying to say is what stage do they turn round and say nothing more we can do. Sorry not being positive I always seem more down on a Sunday,probably this is the one day I have more time to think and my dad comes round while mum is at church and has a cuppa and he tends to talk about the inevitable and how he will cope, see my dad is ill himself and my mum has done a lot for him. Any way I am begining to waffle, hope someone can help no matter how negative it might seem. Hugs to u all xxxxx
FormerMember
there is a nurses question site on here they will answer any questions that you have to the best they can you could write all your questions down and take them to your mums consultant which they are probably the best ones my daughter has lymphoma and i had lots of questions her consultants have been amazeing i know how hard it is and so scary but what ever you do dont give up hope and take care of yourself thinking of you
Know just how you feel.... I have had the same thoughts this week. My mum has battled extenstive breast cancer for around 7 years and more recently it has spread to the lung. Last week she had lung drainage and was in hospital for 5 days. I was off work and had too much time to think! and yes have been thinking the worst and eventually breaking down in tears... Unfortunately there will be an end date and none of us know when that is..... I have managed to turn thoughts around again and try to take each day as it comes... it is good to put in place achievable events, such as meals out, My mum and I are booked into a show in May..... anything could happen! visit to shops and just to spend an hour of quality time when ever possible. but the important thing is to get a balance... positive thinking and being prepared. Hope that helps.... and I'm so glad to know that there are other people like you who are going through a similar stage in their lives.
Hi thanks so much for your reply, At times you feel your the only one going through all the emotions although your not, i am so glad that someone has replied and in a similar situation. Can I ask why it was necessary for your mum to have drainage. My mum also has it in her lung and since August her breathing has got worse, everything is an effort. 5 minutes to get dressed now takes 15 because she is so breathless. I have to help her on with her sleeve as well (she has lymphodema). As you say you get to a point when you cry at the slightest thing. I got choked up when she opened her parcel and it was her trendy new head gear, but being positive I modelled them for her. She is going to have her head shaved once she notices its falling out. It has just struck me i get stressed about little things and that is i am not in control. My life is some what chaoticly organised which i have control over be it work or home life but my mums illness i don't........ I think I need to stick on one of my meditation cds that helps. Thank you once again x love to you and your mum xx
Mum had lung drainage about a month ago ( I say lung drained but I think its more a case of fluid in or near the lining of the lung) as there was a build up of fluid causing the lung to not work properly. The lung was drained but the fluid quickly returned. She has now had the fluid drained fully in hospital and talculm powder put in in attempt to seal the area... so far touch wood this seems to be working. Like your mum my mum had trouble breathing and was cough cough all the time but as soon as the drainage was done the coughing stopped! Hope that helps!
I have had breast cancer for 19 years now. It has been a bit of a roller coaster ride! The last 7 years I have had extensive bone mets, but fortunately no other organs affected.
you asked:
"Think what i'm trying to say is what stage do they turn round and say nothing more we can do."
I think when you have stopped responding to any treatment they have (and there is a whole range of them), then of course there are various trials going on so if you met the criteria set for them, that is a possibility. When you reach that point there is much that can me done to keep you comfortable. Hospices play a tremendous role in this. But none of us knows how long the various treatments we are offered can help for. Some have remission of even years at a time. We just have to take each day as a gift and enjoy it.
