Spiralling tonight! stage 4 recurrent endometrial, had a hysterectomy and radiotherapy last year, bowel resection plus other bits this year. I’m starting chemo and immunotherapy on Monday. I’ve made the mistake of being brave (on the outside at least) with family and friends so much so that they would be really surprised if I cried or broke down. Husband couldn’t work out why I was in such a foul mood today, for example. This is my default setting and it works well in meetings with doctors but I worry I should have been more open about showing the bad bits.
Hi
It is natural to feel that things are spiralling. You are starting new treatments next week and it can feel overwhelming and scary.
I think being brave can be about showing people how you feel and that with cancer sometimes it can all feel pretty rubbish and overwhelming.
I tried to put on a brave face when I was first diagnosed but found the feelings need to come out at some point. For me I could manage to try to be positive some of the time, especially with people that I didn't know so well. For me being able to open up to a few trusted confidants really helped.
Cancer is tough and treatment is tough. Sometimes I did try to protect those closest by putting on a brave face as I did not want to cause them upset. But without being able to talk honestly about my cancer to the chosen few I would really have struggled.
Why not give the Support Line a call and talk it through how you are feeling with one of the nurses. They are there 8am-8pm daily.
Jane
