Just been given an incurable diagnosis

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Hi everyone,  yesterday I was told that, if treatments work well on my incurable cancer, I might a few more years to live. I'm 58. Over the last couple weeks, I've been managing to stay reasonably positive but today is a bad day Pensive

  • Hello   I am so sorry to read your post - I can fully understand your feelings at this time and whilst you need to stay positive just sometimes you are entitled to an "off day". If you don't mind may I make a couple of suggestions:

    * We have another forum you may want to consider joining and here's the link Living with incurable cancer forum - patients only . just click on the link provided to go to the forum - I am sure you will be made very welcome there.

    * If you continue to have some "bad days" please ring our helpline on 0808 808 00 00 (8am to 8pm 7 days a week). The lovely folk there can direct you to the extra support you may need to see you through this patch.

    If I can do anything else for you please don't hesitate to let me know.

    Best wishes - Brian.

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    Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm

    Strength, Courage, Faith, Hope, Defiance, VICTORY.

    I am a Macmillan volunteer.

  • Hi - it's normal to have bad days - it is the constant wondering if and when - try to talk about your feelings and don't be scared to be scared - this forum is a great support and I'm sure you will get a lot more responses - best wishes x

  • Hello,

    I can understand your worries and anxieties completely. I also have incurable cancer where no primary can be found. I am currently undergoing treatment of 3,weekly Chemo and twice daily chemo tablets at home. It’s just the not knowing and your mind spirals out of control. I live alone as lost my husband suddenly 2 yrs ago but one of my sons lives quite near.I have been very worried about side affects but it’s the fatigue which is the worst so I just give in and rest on my bed. We can only put our hands in the medical expertise and hope for a good outcome. Please feel free to message at anytime it helps not feeling so alone x

  • Hello   Thank you for posting - and your kind offer to accept messages. I am so sorry to find you in the same situation as  .

    Feel free to use the link in my original post to join the Living with incurable cancer forum - patients only forum or if you need any additional support - ring our helpline. If I can do anything for you please let me know.

    I don't know if you are aware but we have the "Buddy" scheme where you have your own personal Buddy to chat to - details of this are in this link:

    https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/get-help/emotional-help/macmillan-buddies

    No one should go through cancer alone.

    Kind Regards - Brian.

    Community Champion badge

    Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm

    Strength, Courage, Faith, Hope, Defiance, VICTORY.

    I am a Macmillan volunteer.

  • Hi AH2424, thanks for sharing.  I'll be having the same chemo regime, starting in a few weeks.  I've had Long Covid for about 3 years, so am used to dealing with fatigue, thankfully. 

    I'm so sorry you lost your husband recently- that must make your cancer even harder to deal with.  Do you have friends and other family to support you?