I'm feeling really upset because for the past 3 years I've supported my husband through a very serious illness, culminating in me donating a kidney to him in April this year, 2021. But now I've found this lump of skin on my face & it's been growing & changing colour. It's hard to get through to my GP, I've sent the GP a photo of my skin & he tried ringing me back on Friday, but i missed the call. Now I've been waiting all weekend to be able to ring them back on Monday morning but they're so busy. Once I get through how long will I have to wait for an appointment or treatment. Most of all I'm upset because it seems so unfair, i did everything I could to care for my husband while he was sick (although there is no cure for kidney disease), i gave him my kidney and there's no good karma, all I've got now is cancer. I don't know how I'll face it, I'm so fed up of hospitals. He's much better but now I am ill. I will get through it, because you have to keep going. But I'm just so fed up.
I am really sorry to hear of all the worrying times you have been through with your husband and am pleased that he is much improved now.
Concerning your own worries, you may not necessarily have skin cancer. There are many skin changes that are of no concern and won't make you ill. Wait until you have had a biopsy and results before projecting yourself into a world where you are ill yourself too. Many people post here as they are very worried and a few weeks later they get back to us with good news from their biopsies. I hope you are one of clear biopsy folk soon. Or maybe the dermatology team will consider your lesion doesn't need a biopsy at all. You won't change the outcome by worrying. Get your appointment and take one day at a time until you have clinical results.
If your biopsy does show some form of skin cancer, most lesions are basal cell carcinomas, a slow growing and mostly very uninvasive form that is easily treatable. There have been many amazing improvements in skin cancer care, even for aggressive forms, in recent years.
I understand your feeling of having done all you could for your husband - to the point of even donating a kidney - and feeling that a potential cancer diagnosis is quite simply unfair, unjust and undeserved after all you have been through. Sadly cancer strikes for reasons totally unrelated to how good a person you are. I have always felt that I didn't deserve to get cancer once, let alone twice (breast cancer and melanoma) but in truth all this ruminating about the injustice of it has got me nowhere. As you say so rightly, you get through these things because you have to keep going.
Hello, I think its wonderful that you gave a kidney to your husband and it's great that he is doing better with your kidney. That is a wonderful act and you are both receiving benefit from it.
Your skin concern is a new and separate challenge that you both will face together. Support each other and you will get through it.
I agree with Miranda about self diagnosing. I played google doctor between appointments and chased a lot of crazy worries down a maze of rabbit holes and none of my self diagnosis were correct. Be persistent with the doctors and Express your urgency for answers. You have to advocate for yourself, be persistent, push for appointments and follow up with labs for results.
You control your attitude, not the system, not cancer. Best wishes
