45 year old husband diagnosed last Tuesday with Prostate Cancer

Hi Angela 

I was also 45 when I was diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2013. It was quite a shock. 

I was first put under watchful waiting with annual biopsies, but already in 2015 the biopsy showed that it was time for treatment. 

In June 2015, I had a radical prostatectomy (Da Vinci), and during the operation it turned out that they had to remove the nerve bundles on side. Other than some minor dripping during the first two weeks following the operation, I did not experience any side effects. Shortly after the operation, I was prescribed 5mg Cialis, which I take daily, and everything works fine. 

Unfortunately, two years after the operation, the PSA started rising again, and I was sent for a PET-PSMA scan, which didn't show anything. However, it was decided to give me 35 sessions of salvage radiotherapy, which I had in June/July 2018. I didn't experience any side effects at all. 

One year later, the PSA is still on the rise, so I now have to do another PET-PSMA scan. I am very curious to see what happens next. 

All this to say, that it is possible to go through the different treatments with almost no side effects, so I don't think that you and your husband should worry too much about that.

It is still possible to go on having a perfectly normal life, but it is obviously still very annoying to go through all these processes without any guarantee of results. 

Hi Angela!  Sorry to hear about your husbands diagnosis.  I am. In the same boat as your husband but just a bit older.  I had the same Gleason score on one side and a very high one on the other side of my prostate. 

My prostate has since been removed which I was told was the best option.  It is important to take into consideration if the Op is possible with part or full nerve sparing. 

I was also told I was a bit young for radiotherapy and that with the Op you get all the bad side affects at the start rather than the end.  This is important to consider. 

You could say I am in the category of a patient with bad (painful)  side effects.  But apparently mine was a complicated case. 

I hear there are people with PSA scores in the 30's and 100's but in better shape than me. This bit I don't understand. 

If the operation is recommended take note that there will be ups and downs emotionally and physically.  But with support and understanding,  he will get over it. 

P

Hi Angela, I'm 50 and just had surgery, although too soon to really tell I had nerve sparing but no movement downstairs,  this is concerning but in the scheme of things better than letting the blighter take hold.  I'm still navigating the route of maintaining intimacy even if full sex not possible. I have been offered a pump which I will try and even if nerves not spared there are options. Patience and consideration are key. The nerves are only part of the story  expecting too much and being disappointed would only exasperate the issue.

Hi Ang!  I too am truly sorry to hear about your husband. I am a few years older than him and in the same club. 

Unfortunately,  I had a high Gleason score so a prostatectomy was recently done on me.  I am still suffering from the immediate side affects and awaiting long term gain.  As long as your husband has a low Gleason score and the location of the cancer is not bad, he could have the Op plus full nerve sparing. 

I wish the best for the both of you and know that there will be ups and downs but we are all here in support. 

P

A massive thank you to all of you for sharing your stories, advice and well wishes. He’s still in theatre as we speak it’s been 2 hours and 27 minutes (in with the Davinci robot). Nerve wracking times.