Hi EVERYONE 
The dilemma I face when ever writing on our site is just how much do I express of my feelings, experiences and facts without sounding like an attention seeker. I know most men usually run to their 'Man Cave. ' whenever the above are broached upon but somehow I've always been different. I find it comforting to be as open and honest as I can. So this is me today : -
It was my night duty turn Wednesday to be with my darling till being relieved by my lovely daughter Sarah today along with my son Matt. Anne's sleeping pill didn't work and so throughout the night she was calling for me. When laying on her back she likes me to place my hands under her ankles and gently paddle her legs up and down to assist her circulation. But in general Anne was restless and agitated waving her arms about and mumbling. Yet she's in no pain thank goodness. She called out Mum and Jesus on two seperate occasions. Basically neither of us got much sleep till I eventually told a lovely nurse what was happening and she injected Anne with morphine Later at about 9am Anne showed further agitation so she was injected with a tranquiliser that seemed to calm her but not quite, till I fully closed her private ward room door to keep out the noise and she zonked out bless her. She rests with her eye lids half open which disturbs me as I think she might be dead or dying but after a while Anne closes them, My Sarah, Matt and I are being honoured with comforting our beloved Queen Anne as her life slowly ebbs away. As hard as it is, mentally, emotionally and physically we wouldn't miss this for the world. And I'm sure our darling feels safe along with our unconditional love. Our Macmillan nurse Mary is an absolute Angel and has seen Anne's tranquilizer injections brought forward to every 2hrs along with morphine as necessary. I left my Queen Anne this morning, in the safe hands of her children Sarah and Matt, after we kissed and both whipered we loved each other. My darling wife of 50yrs.
Bless you all x
Thank you so much Squeaky 
Your sharing of such a personal matter was so touching. As a family we know we are are about to lose the 'Rock.' of our family. Thank goodness we are so close to each other. So. So lucky. I'm not ashamed to say this whilst on my own now and not in public my crying is closer to a wolf howling. I lost my mum and dad but this grieving is beyond comprehension.
Bless Geoff.
At the end of all our journeying will be to find ourselves back where we started knowing the place for the first time. TS ELIOT.
