Struggling with chemo - scared to carry and scared to stop

Hi

Am sorry to hear that you are struggling with your chemo. It is a tough treatment to go through.

I had a high grade endometrial cancer in 2022 and I also had carboplatin (plus paclitaxel) The side effects can be hard and many times I felt like giving up. It can all feel very overwhelming at the time and I know I felt really tired and unwell. It felt hard as well as my surgery went well and I was also having it for adjuvant purposes and I remember my consultant saying that it would make me feel very unwell. 

You have done really well in getting half way there now. You are on the home straight. Just one more and you will be over half way. That's how I tried to think of it and also in terms of dealing with one cycle at the time.

Perhaps start to prepare a list of questions to talk to your consultant so that you are in a position to make an informed choice. One thing that made a difference to my side effects was when there was a reduction in dose. Mine was reduced due to neuropathy however it made a big difference to the other effects. I did have quite a few different side effects but when I talked these through with my consultant there were often medications that could make a real difference. 

Is there any side effects in particular that you are finding tough?

Another thing is to try to keep up your chemo diary and use it when you have your review. I found most of my side effects followed a pattern and sometimes knowing when to expect something such as nausea can help them manage it by prescribing medication to prevent it taking hold. 

Have you got a sympathetic CNS that you could talk to? Sometimes just telling someone how you are feeling can make a difference. 

We also have the Macmillan Support Line available if you would like to talk to one of the nurses about specific side effects and what may help. 

You are not alone in feeling as you do, I know I did on many occasions but taking it one step at a time can help. Also planning things on better days can make the bad days feel more doable. 

Jane

Thanks Jane

I think I’m feeling this way because this third cycle was so much worse than the first two. I have been keeping a symptom tracker, but not only were the symptoms worse, but when I had previously started to feel better, I started feeling worse with such bad fatigue that I could only just get showered and dressed and nothing else for several days. 

I think as well, I was starting to enjoy getting back to a bit more normality after surgery - walking my dog, working part time, and those things are beyond me again. 

I’m worried that the cycles will keep getting worse. Hopefully reducing the dose might be an option and help. 

I think it was around the 3rd cycle that my bloods started to come back low in areas- but I am sure yours will be checked at some point before the next cycle. 

I didn't find I got worse with each cycle but I did find the fatigue built up.