New to group. My Dad has multiple myeloma

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Hi,

I’ve decided to join here for support and advice. My Dad was diagnosed with multiple myeloma 4.5yrs ago following abnormal blood results. The diagnosis was confirmed after a bone marrow biopsy. My dad is 76 and up to his diagnosis was well apart for a few conditions which were controlled.

My dad was started on his first round of treatment. We were recently on his 3 round but due to his deterioration it has been paused.

I would say my dad has gotten worse over the last 4-5mths. His pain has increased. Up till recently he was controlling it with paracetamol. Now he is on oxynorm and fentanyl patches. He can wake on a morning in agony and can’t move till his medication has kicked in. My mum is amazing and does so much for him. She was diagnosed with breast cancer and underwent surgery and treatment in 2016-17 and then 3mths later my dad received his diagnosis.
I am an only child with a family of my own. I only live 10mins away from my parents but I work full time.
I’m just trying to be there as much as I can and help where I can.
Dad has had an MRI of his spine and we are now waiting to see the doctors to see what are the next steps. My dad has said he doesn’t want to continue with treatment and I respect his decision. But I would like to know what this means for how much time left we have to spend with him.

I would appreciate any advice.

Thank you in advance

greg777 over 3 years ago

Hi Saz,

Welcome to the forum, although I am really sorry to read about your Dad, I really hope that the medical teams will be able to find a way to get on top of the pain really soon. As to the question in terms of how long your Dad might have without treatment, that is such a difficult question to answer as it can depend on so many factors. If you feel like you would want an idea, then it might be best to speak with your Dad’s medical team so that they can give you some advice in that respect. I was always told that it tends to be an infection that mostly causes death rather than the myeloma per se (although it is the myeloma that weakens the ability to fight the infection) and so that can make it hard to predict with any great certainty when that might be. If you feel you would want to, you can always ask your medical team about your Dad’s decision not to have more treatment, if only to check whether all options have definitely been exhausted or whether there is a different treatment that might be better for your Dad, as I know there are lots of good treatments out there which can maintain the disease and still result in a good quality of life for the patient.

Wishing you and your Dad all the very best

Greg

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