New diagnosis

Hi Jamie your not a fraud , you have had a cancer diagnosis whatever the stage , it’s bound to play with your head the what ifs … but try to enjoy your time inbetween appointments, I have had all of the above , I’m now on a immunotherapy for a year , and so far so good , it is very daunting , but it sounds like it’s all been caught early , don’t beat yourself up about not going to get your mole seen earlier , you have done it now , and your on the right road , with the right people looking after you , it will soon be sorted , hope it all goes well for you

Hi 

you are definitely not a fraud it’s cancer I remember someone saying to me never play it down you are still a cancer  victim I also remember someone saying to me a day after being diagnosed with melanoma well at least it’s not a serious cancer I was devastated all cancers are serious I was diagnosed with a 2.3mm melanoma in April on right side of my chin and in June had wider excision and a node removed behind my ear it has left  a considerable scar on my face a flap on my chin and a large scar running from chi to ear but it’s healing amazingly and I had to wait 6weeks for an all clear on excision and node it’s then getting your head around one day got cancer next day you no disease present it sounds silly but that was hard to deal with as well I was extremely over the moon but it’s like it messed with your head and now have come to terms with that but then in the weather we have had go overboard protecting and checking te operation for the above which you are waiting for tbh I have had no pain killers and had no pain it’s really been incredible the treatment I have received from the NHS 

Please try not to feel a fraud I didn’t tell many people outside my family because I couldn’t deal with the aw sorrys but inside my own unit we all knew what it’s like dealing with the diagnosis 

Good Luck let us know how it goes try be positive but dont feel a fraud 

Regards 

Thank you very much for reaching. It really does sound like you’ve been through the wringer. 

yep I admit the psychological effects of this have been so much worse than the physical ones. I’m a regular gym bunny, so it didn’t help my normal outlet for stress had to stop whilst the wound from the removal healed. 

I have spoken to a few that are close to me, and my immediate team at work, as I know I’ll need some time off for appointments and the SNB when it comes around. They’ve all been very supportive. It’s funny isn’t it. I’m genuinely not an emotional person, but find that the silliest things set me off and make me tearful. So definitely playing in my head than I’ve let on to people. 

my boss is very nice about it all, but she’s only been my boss for a few weeks, so not entirely in that comfort zone where I feel I can open up and be authentic with her about my head space, but that will come I’m sure. 

I hope the rest of your journey goes well and do appreciate you responding thank you ️ 

Thank you

Mid-40's male here and I was similar in noticing the mole had changes some months before I went to the doctor, and with it being on my back it was one of those out of sight, out of mind situations. Mine came back 2b, and I'm still frustrated with myself that I didn't get it checked sooner. I'm perhaps over-cautious now.

And I completely get what you mean about telling people. Early on I found it tough, and I remember one person saying 'if you're going to get cancer that's the one you want' and then talked about it like a minor thing. 2 1/2 years, multiple mole removals, two major surgeries, and lasting life-altering changes kind of disproves that. But I'm here and fighting it, and everything is coming back all clear at the moment

The waiting for the WLE and SLNB is hard, and there's not much I can say to ease that worry. I just stayed focused on the positives in my life and tried to carry on as much as normal. Some days were definitely easier than others.

Hi 

it so tough when people say that’s the one you want to get that happened to me and it makes you fell like saying if it was you don’t think you would feel the same 

I just don’t think people realise just how serious skin cancer can be and what consequences can come from a tiny malignant mole mine was stage 2 desmoplastic mole on right side of chin didn’t hurt didn’t itch but I just thought it wasn’t right

I get the waiting between each stage it’s tough for you and yours 

it’s great you think positive I try but mind messes with your head sometimes 

hope things continue to be positive 

take care 

CMK

Thank you very much for responding. I’m starting to understand the life changes bit myself, I’m currently on holiday in the Caribbean (was booked before all this started). I’m with family and some know and some don’t, but even trying to avoid the sun is a blooming nightmare out here. So even doing something as simple as that is causing a bit of a headache. 

before I came out here, I also tried to keep to a normal schedule. Christ the day I got my diagnosis from the consultant I went back to my office in the hospital and carried on. Probably in a bit of denial I won’t lie. Keeping busy is definitely a big help, as it’s the time I stop and have time to think and reflect I feel bad. 

really glad to hear everything is coming back clear now, and long may that continue

I still struggle with the sun and remembering to put factor 5 on all the time, but I've learnt to carry it with me everywhere! Hoping you can enjoy as much as possible on your holiday, not an easy situation

It really is the down time that gets you, and it can come out of nowhere. I was lucky to have supportive family to talk to, but even then when you're by yourself it's a different beast altogether. My worst time was going to bed as I could distract enough until then. I tried a few different techniques to help focus my mind on other things and it worked more often than not, and it's surprising how something that seems silly does the job.

Really glad you have supportive family around you.

For me it’s when I’m alone with my brain, like when I’m doing a workout or like you say the evenings when getting ready for bed, the distractions are limited so those little thoughts come in to my brain. I’m sure (and hoping) this will get easier over time. 

as for the factor 50, wow it’s like painting on emulsion isn’t it  I feel like a character from twilight minus the Hollywood six pack

Hi 

have you tried Bondi Sand factor 50 I find that’s like putting on a normal moisture lotion and for my face I use the tinted one it is a which recommended one too it’s Australian they are really on point with skin cancer protection products you can buy in Boots 

CMK