Awaiting excision, awaiting results

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Hi all, 

As the title suggests, I’m awaiting a mole excision… and then will be waiting on results. I am terrified if I’m honest. I don’t know how I’m supposed to just, keep waiting. 

I am also really distrusting of my initial mole mapping which had sent me away as ‘all good’ (it was done with dermatoscope). I since trusted my gut and pushed for a second opinion to check another mole again, but since this is now on list for excising, I am now looking at all of my moles and thinking: is this one dangerous too? What about this one? Was this one also missed? I’m very moley , so it’s not as easy as just asking them to check my 4 moles, I have a lot (always have). 

I am so scared. I am early 30s. But I know this means so little. 

does anyone have any advice? Or stories of hope? I’ve fallen so far down I’ve been researching stage 4 treatments, survival rates, everything. 

thanks all.