A lot has happened since Christmas day. I'm not sure I've processed everything yet. Just focusing on what to do in the moment is all I can manage right now. My son had to be taken to A&E on Boxing Day, he'd felt poorly the day before, headache and nausea, he suffers with anxiety and had spent 4 years going through courts to see his children. We were going to have them on Boxing Day and Bank holiday so he thought he was just feeling a bit depressed. I couldn't get him to eat much and when he did it came back not long after, his ribs were sore from a long term cough which had recently got worse. He had an x ray over a year ago. It was clear and he was told he had COPD but some follow ups were supposed to happen. When he got an appointment it said he should wait in his car until he could be seen so he rang to say he didn't have a car he'd be coming on a bike. he was told not to come in that case because of the measures being taken not spread covid and he'd be sent another appointment. Unfortunately the appointment he was sent was months away and he forgot all about it. He realised a couple weeks late that he'd missed it and rang to apologise and arrange for another appointment but was told the request for the scan had expired and he needed to see his gp again. That's not easy thanks to Covid and he was sent again for x-rays, yet again clear so nothing else had happened yet. I've been nagging him about his contant headaches, it isn't normal to have them every day, even now I'm not sure he did anything other than mention it to his gp in passing. So- Boxing day, more clear x-rays but they had also taken bloods which A&E weren't happy with so on the Wednesday he had an all day appointment at the Acute Assessment dept. The scans showed several small growths and he was referred to the Lung Clinic which should have happened within three weeks. On his way home he got a call from the hospital to say that the results from a stomach scan were back and showed a large blood clot in his stomach so he was to go to the local chemist to pick up blood thinners to try and disperse it, the prescription had already been sent. He seemed to pick up a bit until New Year and I found myself having to bully him to eat anything. He wasn't great but sort of muddling through but on the morning of the third, bank holiday of course so none of the phone numbers we had were working, I found him running with sweat, unable to lift his head by himself and vomiting fluid, I called a friend who can drive and called 111, it took ages to get through and they said if we could get him in ourselves rather than them send an ambulance they'd be able to see him sooner. They didn't want to let me in with him but I insisted, he couldn't stand to give his details at reception and they gave in. I told them he'd bumped his head. A bump on the head and blood thinners equals a brain scan, which was how we discovered that he also had three brain tumours. A 3 and a half centimetre one in the left cerebellum, they wanted to remove. He saw the neurology team on the Friday and was booked in for surgery on the Monday. On Saturday he struggled to eat again and just laid hoding his head. Sunday he was no better but wanted to visit friends and got rather worked up when told it wasn't a good idea. Monday morning came and it was hard to get him up and into the car to drive to the hospital, once there we had to get a wheelchair to get him to the admissions ward, he couldn't answer questions properly and looked about a hundred. He was given another brain scan and the tumour had been bleeding and he'd developed Hydroencephalus. He had to have a drain inserted and the pressure relieved before they were able to operate. The procedures took over 6 hours. I can't describe how I was feeling, when the call came to say he was in recovery and they were pleased with how it had gone I just burst into tears.At quarter to midnight I was still working through a list of people that had been calling for news and updates. I hadn't had anything to eat so thought maybe I should stop, have something to eat, get some sleep and resume in the morning. He came home on Thursday night. He seemed pretty good considering eberything but by Friday evening he was back to struggling to eat and in terrible pain with his stomach. 111 only took an hour to get through to, after they had all the information and got him on priority the callback from Devon Doctors was only about 20 minutes and another 20 before a doctor arrived to see him. He changed his pain med from morphine to Oxycoton. He has a gastrointestinal bleed which can't be treated in the normal fashion in case it causes another brain bleed. All a bit of a balancing act for the moment. He sees the oncology team on Wednesday when hopefully we will get some idea of what cancer it is and what the next steps are. My youngest son died 27 years ago, I am terrified that I may be facing outliving both of them. I will be 69 in two weeks, his Dad died at 50 from cancer. I don't know what i should be doing or not doing so any help or advice will be invaluable. Sorry it's a long read, it's felt like a roller coaster without the fun factor.
