Hodgkins relapse

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hello everyone, I had Hodgkins Lymphoma stage 4 last year. Had a pet scan last April which showed complete metabolic response so carried on the treatment until August 2020. I had a ct scan in the September that showed a 2cm lump still in my chest near throat, I could feel it. My consultant said it was scar tissue. I never believed her, never saw her again until a year later after I had to complain. 

I have been getting other symptoms, wasn't listen to so demanded a ct scan. yesterday I have been told its back, 10cm mass in chest. I will need stem cell transplant and hose dose chemo. I am 60, still recovering from the last treatment and not healthy at all. I am terrified that my body will not cope with the proposed treatment. How have you done if you had this?