Reaching out

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Hello everyone, 

I am reaching out to you all again as found your help and kind words so reassuring last year when my husband had his operation and treatment for tonsil cancer - thank you xx

At the same time as my husband was having radiotherapy my father was diagnosed with cancer in the roof of his mouth - a slow moving cancer which had been doing lots of damage over a long time. He went on to have surgery in December to remove most of the roof of his mouth and has struggled with recovery. After surgery there was no visible cancer left and as it was a slow moving cancer the likelihood of it coming back was quite small.

However he has been really slow to heal and recover and then he developed a hard lump in the right side of his neck.

We went back to the hospital on Weds for him to have biopsies, ultrasound and MRI done.

We went back yesterday to be told the cancer has returned rapidly around the area of the operation and into his lymph nodes. The oncologist said this is totally uncharacteristic of the type of cancer he had and is not sure why it has acted this way. We will get the biopsy results this week but he said that without treatment dad would only have a few months.

We are totally heartbroken.

The oncologist has offered radiotherapy but dad does not want this after watching my husband go through treatment last summer, he said he couldn't cope, and he is already so so weak.

I'm not really sure what I am asking of you all but I just feel like this is a place that I can say what's happening to us.

Paula xx

  • Thank you Dani xxx

    We are getting our head round information this weekend and then the oncologist is going to contact us next week for dad's decision.

    The team spoke about community care/palliative care very briefly but we will ask more this week and also thank you for advice re GP and hospice.

    Thank you for the hugs.

    Paula xx

  • Hi Paula

    I am so sorry to hear about your very sad news. I can understand your dad's decision as he has had such a terrible time already  but I also know that it is impossible to let go of the people we love. I hope the doctors will help him be as comfortable as possible to enable him to have lots of quality time with you and your family. 

    My thoughts are with you. 

    Sending you loads of love and hugs. 


  • Thank you Fab1 for your thoughts and kind words xx