Emotional day

Hello, Lizzie - Treatment for head and neck cancers is very challenging, physically and emotionally. Once I was recovering physically from an 8 hour operation I was hit by the emotional response. I too had wonderful family support, but it is natural to struggle with the new reality post-treatment even when the treatment is deemed a success.

Take one step at a time this Christmas, ask for help if things look too much for you, and I hope you can relax and enjoy things.

Lots of love to you and everyone else in this lovely community. Cathy xx 

Thankyou Cathy.  Kind and thoughtful words. X

Hi Lizzie. My first Christmas post treatment I was in similar stage as yiu I finished 31 August. Best I can suggest is lay down the ground times as much as we May thjnk it we aren’t superwoman. Delegate responsibility to others, explain you’re in recovery your bodies still healing. As fir emotion s have you ihad  your pet scan yet  sorry can’t remember if you have ?Thus coukd be on your mind as well plus the worry of sitting down trying to be jolly when you want to curl up in bed. Make people work round you it’s fine to go to bed if you need a nap just be open snd tell people. As fir food I had 2 ensures befire people came to us on Christmas Eve then played around with what was on my plate x will send you the Peter Harvey article get guests to read that. Just because our treatment is over that’s not the r d if it. You’ll get there just don’t try to do it al.

Hazel

Hi Lizzie this is the article 

https://cancercounsellinglondon.org.uk/about/after-the-treatment-finishes-then-what/

Hazel

Hi Lizzie, don't be so hard on yourself, no one will expect you to be how you were, but you will be in time. What you can't cope with people will understand. Just do what you can and have a lovely time with your loved ones. I had just finished my treatment 4 years ago, and I thought I'd never be the same again, however, here I am getting ready to cook the dinner tomorrow, as I have done for the last 3 years, and all the years before my illness. So hang in there Lizzie, have a great Christmas.

Regards Ray.

Hi Lizzie, I'm not the one who has cancer, it's my son, so it's been difficult for me to watch him go through the surgery and all the treatment for stage 4 cheek and jaw cancer.  He's had numerous setbacks, and only last week had another MRI scan, and has an appointment early January for a biopsy.  It's good that you have the support of the family, but it's only natural to feel emotional.  It's early days yet, but things will start to slowly improve.  Don't worry about family coming for Christmas, get everyone to help out.  You don't need to cope alone.  I've found the forum so wonderfully helpful, as I've come on here when I've not been sure about what the treatment was my son was having.  Take care of yourself, relax and let others do things for you.  I had open heart surgery a few years ago and I found that a few weeks after the surgery I was very emotional, I think it's a sort of release from knowing you've had life saving surgery.  Look forward to a better New Year.  I wish you all the best for a lovely Christmas with your family xx

Janet

Hi Lizzie

I am sorry you are going through a rough time at the moment. It is only natural after what you have gone through that you are having an emotional reaction. I know I went through one for a while after my last operation but with time  it did pass. It takes a while to adjust to the changes but things do improve.

As the others have advised take a step back on Christmas day and if you feel tired take some time out. Everyone will understand.

You may not be able to eat everything that is on the Christmas menu but pick and choose and eat what suits you. I know I have had an adapted Christmas menu for some time but I still enjoy what I can manage.

In relation to the hearing loss because of the fluid in your ear. I also had this happen after my last operation. My surgeon was great and put in a grommet to drain the fluid and my hearing came back really quickly. Is this an option that you can pursue? Amongst other things having hearing loss can be a real pain.

Wishing you all the best this Christmas, I know your next one will be a whole lot better.

Lyn

Hi Hazel.   I thought you would have wise words. I haven’t had pet scan yet and you are exactly right, it is playing on my mind.  It is in early January.  I have read that article but will re read.  Christmas is an emotional time snyway isn’t it.  Thankyou 

lizzie

Hi Ray.   My husband says I sm hard on myself.  I do expect too much.   The trouble is I want it to be like it was before    But you give me hope when you say it will happen in time.  Thankyou 

lizzie

Hi Lyn.  I have mentioned grommets to my consultant but he wasn’t keen.  He wants to wait until they clear naturally.  I do find it very alienating to be so deaf.  It’s another way I can’t join in so much.  Thankyou for your reply.  I do appreciate all the support this forum offers.  Thankyou to everyone on here. 
lizzie