Neck cancer.

Hi Anna Marie. I’m Hazel and am o4.5 years into remission for tonsil cancer with several affected lymph nodes lAm so sorry ti hear your consultant used those words bad  and serious a tad unprofessional of  them. The waiting by far the worst time m take heart  that many head and neck cancers respond extremely well to treatment, as many if us in here can testify. Until you get a bit more info sorry can’t be specific as to what your treatment will be. Did you have a cancer nurse assigned to you  or a Macmillian nurse ? If so give them a call to se if they can expand on what type if cancer. Mine was squamous cells in my tonsil and lymph nodes  HPV driven tumour.

Please resist looking in dr Google as you’ll be like a rabbit caught in the headlights honestly. I do hope you can try to compartmentalise until after your pet Ct scan and that the consultant gets a better bedside manner. In the meantime pop on here and we will try to keep you sane. 
Hazel x

AnnaMary said:

How do you cope?

Oh heavens. What a crass statement from your consultant!

I can't comment on your diagnosis but a swollen lymph node is the classic presentation of oropharyngeal cancer 80% of which is caused by HPV and is curable. Treatment is tough but doable so maybe hang on to the fact that you have a high probability of being OK.

Hello. So unprofessional of your consultant to use such words. 
I am 8 months post treatment for tonsil & lymph node hpv 16 cancer. I presented in Sept 2021 with a lump on right side of neck.I had ultrasound, camera up nose & down throat, needle biopsies, MRI & PET CT. Had bilateral tonsillectomy plus part of tongue removed followed by 6 weeks of chemoradiation. I was in limbo over Christmas last year & know how frightening it is. It is a very tough process but there is hope & many of us on this forum can testify to that. As for coping mechanisms, everyone is different. This community is a wonderful source of wisdom & support. Macmillan have a support line, live chat etc Please ask anything, I’m happy to answer if I can

Thank you so much for responding. The world seems a much less lonely place for me tonight, knowing there are kind people out there who understand. I think you're absolutely right about Dr Google and I'm resisting delving too deeply so far. I'm trying not to think very far ahead although it can be hard at times. As yet, I have no assigned cancer or Macmillan nurse. I will certainly read your blog. Hopefully I can hold things together over Christmas. 

Thank you for your kind reply. Since the bombshell was dropped on Friday I've spent the weekend imagining truly horrible scenarios. Finding this page has been a blessing.

Thank you.  I know the road ahead will be hard but knowing others have coped really helps. I still haven't told many people . My husband wants me to wait until we know exactly what is happening. I can see his point but keeping quiet isn't easy.

Hi and welcome from me.  I can only concur with what has already been said.

I was told In November 2019 - 2 days before I went on holiday for 3 1/2 weeks.  That holiday was the best thing for distracting me and allowing me to settle before coming back to scans etc.  I decided on no start of treatment before that Christmas but I had told my family and friends.  I thought that I held it together well but I did melt down at that Christmas lunch - you are allowed to do that!

I'll cheer you up - my journey is far of the normal path for these cancers - but I am now just over 3 years since diagnosis and truly living a great life.  Yes, any of the treatments are difficult, but doable.  The after effects will change your life, but for the majority of us these are not quality of life limiting.  The vast majority of us are as close to definitively cured as can be and life a good and long life.  There is every chance you will too.

Stay with us as we are a close knit community that really do support each other.

Thank you. I really need to hear these positive stories just now. I'm still finding my way around this website but I look forward to hearing the stories of how people cope with these life changing events.

I told different people at different stages. I had to tell work as they needed to plan for my absence. I would say do what feels right for YOU, not for anyone else

I am so afraid, I don't know where to start. From my consultant I received the most negative response ever, considering I went in to see him not knowing it was cancer and I hadn't even had the CT scan or the PET scan done then. A lump under my right jaw, squamous cells that have spread to my neck and a half numb face which they thought was Bells Palsy. How did I believe this for so long? (About 6 months it was.) Before this I had a camera down my oesophagus,was told there was 'nothing sinister' going on and had my throat stretched with  a balloon, which helped for a while. I wonder who else has experienced this horrible numbness. Is it normal. He said it will probably never go away. My eye is so sore, watering constantly so I have to wear a patch. I feel lost.