Second time

Oh you poor thing. Both of you really. It’s a horrid place to revisit. I was chatting to my oncologist once about self monitoring and I said a little knowledge is a dangerous thing to which he countered that too much was just as bad. So I understand why you feel the way you do. 

I don’t know what sort of treatment your husband might be offered but there have been some great results with immunotherapy and there are a few threads running here. 

So sorry you are having surgery at the same time all this is happening. 
Do you have a Maggie’s centre near you? A lot of people find the support and counselling they offer a real lifesaver. I’m sure things are opening up a little to allow for face to face contact

Can your GP help with maybe mild sleeping tablets if you are not getting enough sleep? You have to look after yourself too and you don’t have to be strong, you just get on and do the best you can because there is no choice  

Have a look at the carers group here 

https://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer_experiences/carers-only-forum

That might be some help too

My best wishes and I hope you can get through this together. 

 It is so sad to hear your news and it leaves you with all sort of unknowns. The health service can manage without you for a while as you need to look out only for yourself and your family at the moment. Your GP would be helpful with any sick leave request, I’m sure. Practical support from family and friends, is so useful when you are juggling so many demands and often they are often just waiting to be asked. 

Hi oh dear am so sorry to read this post   I can’t add much to what Dani has already said , hope you can get through this together . 
Hazel x

I am so sorry to hear about your husband’s second bout of cancer and all the other medical issues that have arisen in your life. Sometimes life can be unfair and my heart goes out to you.

Like your husband I had my first bout of cancer in 2013 and things went fairly smoothly until 2019 when it decided to raise its head again in a different area of my mouth. It was so disappointing as I thought that I had got through that phase in my life and could move on. Having to face another operation and the treatment afterwards was daunting. In the end I just had to put my head down and get on with it. However that said here I am now doing well and back into life again and appreciating and enjoying every moment.

I found I definitely needed more emotional support the second time around which is where I found this forum so helpful. My GP and surgeon were both so supportive and gave me lots of time when I saw them and that made a big difference as well. They did suggest a short course of antidepressants to help me along.

You have a lot to cope with and working in oncology must be a real challenge at the moment. Look after yourself and keep coming back to the forum for support.

Best wishes to you all

Lyn

We don't have a maggies we have Cavendish which I think may be the same. My doctor has given me sleeping tablets which I haven't taken yet as I don't want to feel drugged up when my hubby needs me. Thank you for the links I know I'm unable to cope with this alone and think that they will help thank you 

Please take care of yourself and just shout here if you would like a little forum support. Xx

Afraid I can't offer any advice beyond that already given. So very sorry to hear everything you are having to cope with. My thought are with you xx 

I'm so sorry you're having to go through all this.

Well done for seeking some help and support.

All the best and take care.

Linda x