Hi I'm a newbie here
My brother is 54 he has a large tumour on the base of his tongue that was wrongly diagnosed as a tooth abcess everything's happend so fast he's in hospital miles away and I have no trouble understanding him face to face but it's heartbreaking trying to understand him when he's quite distressed on the phone .Currently he's refusing to comply with treatment and he keeps saying he doesn't understand the doc and I've been to see him to try helping him understand.He needs his calcium level in his blood lowering with a substance that is quite toxic,before he can have tooth extractions so he then can be fitted for a mask for his treatment I think he's heard Toxic and doesn't want it .I'm terrified he's delaying everything he's losing weight fast and I feel helpless has anyone else had similar experience
Hello MssP
Welcome to our community but so sorry you have found yourself here. You sound as if you need some professional help in helping your brother through this. Does your brother have a cancer nurse assigned to him? Perhaps she can sit down with him and explain what is happening. If he’s in hospital it should be fairly easy to access some support. There are also the Macmillan nurses who would probably be part of his support team.
It sounds as if he is so scared he doesn’t know which way to turn. It’s not surprising. Have a word with his nurse and take it from there.
You can always talk to Macmillan yourself.
www.macmillan.org.uk/.../get-support
I hope you find a way out of this for both of you
Dani
Base of tongue cancer. T2N0M0 6 weeks Radiotherapy finished January 2019
Good evening MssP, totally agree with Beesuit, it sounds as if the information is falling on deaf ears may be due to the shock of the news. He must listen or get it explained to him why they need to do certain treatments before the main treatment plan can begin. I must all sound scary to both you and him but im sure once its explained the clearer it will become. The actual treatment for the tumour is very straightforward and has been done many times by the consultants and their teams with very good success rates. I think using the word TOXIC and the meaning of it should be made clearer to him as sometimes consultants /Drs don't explain procedures as well as nurses, i hope your brother gets put at ease a.s.a.p, wishing you both all the best, take care.
Chris.
Its sometimes not easy but its worth it !
