Hi
I got the call yesterday with confirmation of the news I’d dreaded hearing. I actually feel numb. Not sure if I’ve actually processed it yet! No idea what stage my cervical cancer is, tests pending.
I don’t know how to tell my kids. They’re teenagers and I’m worried they go straight to worst case scenario.
trying to stay positive until I know stage/grade but right now I honestly have no feelings at all. Is this normal? Should I not have had some kind of emotional response?
Hi Asilangeland welcome to our group!
It is a huge shock when you get a cancer diagnosis, and initially it’s very difficult when you don’t have any further information-the not knowing is far harder to cope with than knowing. Certainly I think it’s normal to feel numb and in a bit of disbelief. But there’s no right or wrong way to feel-we all process this differently and however we feel is ok and absolutely fine. Some people may break down and cry, some may go quiet but it’s all normal.
Things will start to feel easier once you know your stage and treatment plan-funnily enough I have never know my grade at any point, but stage is the important number as it will determine the right treatment.
I found for me it was best to wait till I had more information before I told my kids. I wanted to be able to say what it was, and what was going to be done. At this point you can’t really answer any questions for them, and that might cause them to worry more, but if you have a plan of action it’s more positive, and I know that helped my daughters because they’ve told me it did.
You’ll have a bit of waiting now for everything to happen-scans and results etc and we all know that waiting period is tough. Please keep in touch and use the group to ask any questions, or share any worries. We have lovely ladies here who will help and support you who know exactly what it’s like for you.
Sarah xx
Thank you Sarah
yeah I’ve decided to wait until I have more information before I say anything. It’s difficult cause I feel like I’m lying to them.
I still can’t believe this is happening.
I’m a nurse and I can’t decide if knowing from a professional side what happens is making it easier. I think I’d maybe rather not have so much information of what might be ahead .
It might well be more difficult having professional knowledge, but treatment is really not as bad or as scary as it might appear. But it’s not really lying to your kids-it’s just saving them worry while you don’t know enough information and I think that’s for the best while you don’t have answers to any questions they may have. This is a very treatable cancer, but our minds can all tend to go to worst case scenario at the start.
The treatment for cervical cancer is well established and follows international guidelines, so it will follow either of 2 paths normally-surgery if it’s early enough stage, or low dose chemo and radiation combined. Try not to let your mind rush ahead if you can help it, but I know how hard that is, having been there done that!
Sarah xx
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