Lack of family support

I do understand how you feel. I have 3 sisters who I know love me dearly. They don't always know what to do or say. I also have 3 grown up kids. I don't see them as much as I would like or perhaps need. I need those visits or coffees too but unlike you, I struggle to ask. I also have friends in church. Perhaps your family just don't know what to say; they know they can't 'fix it' so it seems easier to stay away, perhaps there's a little bit of fear in them too, trying to deal with the diagnosis, their love for you, their own emotions etc. I joined a support group in my area, we meet for coffee, chats and outings every week and it certainly helps. Perhaps writing to your family suggesting ways they could support you more and what you would like from them, perhaps them seeing it in writing would get the message across more clearer. Is there a support group close by that you could join?. I'm so sorry you've been the one to be always giving and now that you need that yourself, its not there. Hoping things change for you, you're so worth it. In the meantime... Best wishes xxx

Thank you for reply.

I find it very hard to ask for help.

I'm not looking for much just a visit occasionally. 

I did message and say I was struggling which took a lot for me to say.

I didn't get any response from that.

I have friends that I do go for coffee with so I'm thankful for that.

Doreen.

I find the mentality of family is so important.  Those who see only mainstream doom and gloom and don’t see anything outside of traditional treatment can be depressing as they push you to be controlled by what you don’t want and don’t encourage you to follow what’s right for you.  Finding support from the right mindset as yourself is very hard.

I find it hard where mental, spiritual and emotional factors are dismissed as irrelevant when chronic stress is a major factor in the start of disease.

Hi

Hope you are having a better day today.

Don't think your alone in this. Family are a strange creature and there is noway you can predict how they will react or respond. 

I have been on this cancer road for 20 years and sometimes feel that they don't think about it anymore because I am still here.

My lads are better than my daughter which drives them mad and the boys keep telling me to say no but family are important to me and mine gave me no support. So I said I would never be like them.

Visting you now that's a good point, mine, my sister and parents never came up or do now. 

Too busy? I don't know maybe. I think people are so wrapped up in their own day to day things life they forget simple things or others. 

My own feeling are people have become quite selfish especially since covid.

Talk with them tell.them how you are feeling they won't know unless you do.