Diagnosed with breast cancer at 41

Hi, I'm one of the champions here in this group and I just wanted to acknowledge your post.  It's so difficult making decisions about treatment. I am sure someone with a similar experience will be along soon to comment, but in the meantime, the lovely folks here at Macmillan are always at the end of the phone to chat things through. You can reach them on 0800 808 0000 from 8am to 8pm daily. Best wishes 

Hi!  I had a mastectomy on August 12 this year, I am typing this on 11 September, so, 30 days ago.  A month ago, on 11 August, I was squishing down the affected breast and trying to imagine life without it.  

Before that, I had 2 operations aimed at conserving the breast.  The first operation (in May) was combined with a biopsy of the sentinel lymph node.  Because of the radioactive tracer and the dye, I ended up peeing blue/green urine for a couple of days, which I found quite amusing.  Twenty-three days after the operation, I received the fabulous news that the cells had not reached the lymph nodes.

My original lump was 1.1 cm, but they found scattered cells near the margins.  Hence, the second operation, in June.  After the second surgery, there were pre-cancer cells near the margins.  Did I want a mastectomy when it would mean less chance of cancer coming back?  Both in terms of feelings and in terms of trying to apply logic, sacrificing a lump of flesh seemed much less bad than the prospect of going through uncertainty and testing again.

In terms of pain, they clearly gave me some stuff during and after surgery.  But, as with the previous 2 surgeries, I was able to manage after that point with ordinary paracetamol.  They did offer me cocodamol, though.  Although they kept me in hospital for the night, I was well enough to go out in the evening (with long-suffering family member) to try and take pictures of the solar eclipse.

How has life been since the mastectomy?  Well, Dolly Parton died and then Tim Curry died and I was a fan...

That is to say that a bunch of other things, both good and bad, seem to be more important than having a lopsided chest with a long scar.  It's not very nice having a long scar, but it's not the end of the world.  

But that's a personal thing.  I am single and it's been a very long time since anyone non-medical has seen my naked chest except me.  I imagine that it would be very different to someone in a sexual relationship, or someone who really liked how their breasts looked.  

One of my family members had a mastectomy, and then was offered the opportunity a year later to have a preventative mastectomy on the other breast.  She went for the mastectomy plus reconstruction.  I can see the logic in having reconstruction at that stage, because then a person gets to choose what size they want.  

Within limits, as she had to get the flesh taken from her abdomen.  

I hope I am not rambling too much.  Long story short, I had a mastectomy.  Without reconstruction.  And it wasn't pleasant, but it wasn't overwhelmingly awful.  Not to me as an individual.  It all depends on how you feel about the appearance of your breasts, and that's a very individual thing.

Thank you for sharing your experience with me.

im leaning more towards the mastectomy but I’ve been given lots of reading material by the consultant but it’s a little overwhelming so I haven’t even looked at it. 

Thank you again for sharing it helps a lot

sending you hugs for a speedy recovery x

You're welcome.  I think that my physical recovery has gone very well.  I am hoping to be allowed to go swimming again soon.  Even after the wound has healed on the surface, they still don't want you getting the area *too* wet for a few weeks.  

Hi 

I have been told I have to have a mastectomy in the next 3 weeks. I am confused whether to go for construction surgery. How big is the scar would be if the fat is taken from your stomach? 

Hi!  One of my family members had reconstruction and I have never asked about the abdominal scar.  So, I can't answer that part of the question.

But I did have a mastectomy just over a month ago and I maybe I can help you decide whether reconstruction is worth it to you, as a unique individual.  There is a bra company which specialises in bras for women who have had single mastectomies.  Not sure if I am allowed to say the name here or not, but it's unobra.  I looked at their instagram for quite a while to see how I felt seeing pictures of women with lop-sided cleavage.  

And I didn't feel they looked particularly incomplete. 

There was a woman in the news about the same time who had been badly bitten by a dog and she was showing off her prosthetic noses (different according to how suntanned she was) and I thought, okay, she's very brave, but it personally freaked me out a bit looking at her.  I'm sure her friends and family are fully used to it by now.  And, much respect to her.  

But, if I had nasal damage and I had to choose, I would try and get nasal reconstruction if I could.  If that were an option.

So, to decide how you feel about not getting reconstruction, or not getting it at the same time as your surgery, I would recommend looking at photographs of women who have one breast removed.  How much would it upset you to look that way?  I think it's a very personal thing, and I hope I'm not hurting anyone's feelings.

I personally looked at the photographs and thought yeah, I think I could get on with my life if my chest looked lopsided.

It's very individual.

Thank you so much for responding. ️ You are right, I have time to do my research and then decide. I am just so lost at the moment and overwhelmed by it all.

Hiya

Im sorry you’re going through a similar situation.

they told me if I get an implant then it’s minimal but they think the better option would be to use my own tissue from my stomach so that would be hip to hip scar. The scars don’t bother me its the thought of adding on additional surgery time with more complications

This is exactly how I feel. I researched a lot this weekend about both and it’s a lot to take in. 

all I can say is give yourself time to process it all and then make the decision that’s right for you

That is exactly what I am thinking, adding to the mastectomy with another op that could cause issues on its own God forbid. Also don’t implants have a lifeline of 10 years or something and then need changing? 

I am going to look at special bras. So confused at the moment.