Diagnosed this week

Hi April 

So sorry you have joined this club. I was diagnosed just over 3 weeks ago. I can't even begin to describe to people what it's like when you're told you have cancer. It is truly terrifying, shocking, like a nightmare. So far I've found waiting for results and next steps the worst thing. Your mind wanders to all sorts of scenarios and you're forced to get your head around something so life-changing in a short space of time. You just have to take it one step at a time. Get through each day. Feel whatever you're feeling. Accept it may be a few weeks before you know exactly what your treatment plan will be. Trust the nurses and doctors who deal with this stuff everyday. 

It's different for everyone but I'm at the stage where they've decided I'll have chemo, then surgery in about 6 months. My next step is to meet with the oncologist to discuss my chemo timeline. It feels like forever but the NHS seem very quick and on the ball. They also assured me the cancer won't get worse in just a few weeks.

I hope you get your next appointment soon. And you take care of yourself. It's disconcerting I feel remarkably well and can do everything I normally do in my everyday life. Doing normal stuff will help get you through. And letting yourself feel sad and scared. You can do this.

Hi Tabby cat,

Wow you sure have hit the nail on the Head!

The last few weeks have been so torturing, waiting for appointments and then waiting for results.  I have always been good around people and when I went for my first procedure I had a mamagram, ultra sound scan and biopsy. Up until they got a second opinion from another professional I was telling myself it's OK just a lipoma of fatty tissue gone hard, but when she looked at the screen I watched her body language and knew at that point oh god this is not good.

The last two weeks have been so bad waiting to be diagnosed, and when you hear those word said it like everything around you disapears and goes silent, not sure it has completely sunk in yet I anticipate when I get the full facts and know what kind of treatment program they will put me on, maybe that's when It will become more real.

The irony of it all is that I had signed up to do "Race for life" in June only a month ago and now this has happened not sure if its gonna colide with any treatment I'm going to need, life is so unpredictable x

I totally agree with your description of what it's like when they tell you. I felt like the world had stopped. Like my life was over. I found it strange people were carrying on with normal activities! Whilst for me, it felt like everything was over.

Life is so unpredictable. I have tickets to see Arctic Monkeys and Blur this summer and it's frustrating I probably won't be able to go. Cancer really does put a massive spanner in your life, doesn't it.

I think now we have to accept things are going to be different to how we imagined. I read somewhere (possibly on this forum) when you start treatment, you're like a passenger on the recovery journey. You don't have a lot of control over what's happening but at least you know you're on the right road. 

You really do go through a range of emotions in such a short time. Right now, I'm feeling quite positive. You will get through this time. I hope you manage to get a few smiles on your face during these tough weeks waiting for results and appointments x

I total relate to how you have also described your situation, even though our diagnosis may turn out to be different I think we're all reading from the same page with emotions.

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you, hopefully you will get to see Arctic monkeys and Blur it would be great! but like you say and I love the quote "we're Like passengers on the recovery journey". 

I just want to get started and get through it as soon as possible, but I know it's going to take president over anything else in my life right now, life is so precious.

Thank you for your support! I already feel part of a new family that I need to get to know more about.

I'm sure you have a good team helping you and you will get through this x

Hey, I’ve also been recently diagnosed, March 21st.  I’d felt an inconsistency in my right breast, from that moment I kind of “knew” the outcome wasn’t going to be great.  Im also a person who is generally fit and healthy, but being a realist this didn’t feel right! 
My first procedure was exactly as you described, I have an appointment for next Friday to discuss the results and treatment plan.  I’m feeling in a limbo land, but also that seems preferable to the uncertainty of what the future might hold…. 
Best of luck, strength and much love to you xx

Hi Tabbycat, It has also been about three weeks for me and I've had the same experience. I am also going to be doing six months of chemo and then surgery. I was really worried that the cancer could spread while I'm doing chemo. I am waiting for a start date and for the port to be put in. Something else I don't really understand. They said it goes under the skin and heals over so I can swim... but how do they get the IV in then? Maybe I am missing something obvious. how are you sleeping? I'm ok in the day but just can't get a good nights sleep. Unrelated nightmares, waking up in the night and struggling to sleep at all. Sorry for babble. I wasn't ready until now to  connect with anyone else.

Warm wishes, LKM

Thank you for sharing, 

I just assumed at first that because I could not feel a lump I was OK,  and ignored the fact, but quickly realised when I finally made the call to my gp that noticing my left breast was miss shaped from her reaction and getting me booked in to see a specialist within a week I knew it was no joke.  I first noticed a change just before Xmas.

I too feel in limbo, and can't quite get it together as I mention earlier to tabby cat, I just feel a bit numb and it's so not like me, I have always been a person who has gears at work and is sharp and pushes to meet deadlines, but now I'm like whatever I suppose we realise what is actually more important in life and health is so precious. X

I wish you all well in your treatment,

I'm sure I will find out what they have in store for me too once I find out MRI and Her2 results x

It must be so hard to work with the uncertainty and fear that come with the diagnosis.  I’d always planned to take this year off and travel, my mum had dementia and died last year, so I was giving myself a break.  Obviously those plans are now on hold, we had one amazing trip away and I’m not currently working.  
I’m sure your employers will be understanding but I totally understand the lack of enthusiasm for those things that now don’t seem to matter.  Make sure to take time for the precious things in life. I’ve been setting seeds and growing the flowers for my daughters weeding bouquet 

So sorry to hear about your mum passing,  im sure you will fulfill your dream to travel in the near future, my mum has also been diagnosed with dementia, and my dad passed two years ago,  it seems to be that there has been no let up since covid, I struggled alot with mental health during that time and think maybe all the stress has brought on the cancer?  Silly idea I know, but like you say I'm now having to just let things go, not go hung up on things and just feel like I'm going to just drift through one day at a time take it as it comes, thismorning I had a cry but its OK for us to cry right?

We have a little holiday booked in October to butlins mainly for our 3 year old son so fingers crossed I can get though treatment before then.

Wow a wedding wonderful idea growing your own flowers   

I'm also concerned as my work doesn't pay sick pay so if I have to take time off financially I'm not sure what to do, but will see how things pan out first x