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Hi , Welcome to the club you never wanted to join. Lots of people on here who have been just where you are now .I think this is the worst bit -waiting for the results to know what treatment will be needed. Honestly once the plan is in place you will know where you are and can make plans accordingly. But and it is a big but, breast cancer is very treatable now  and before very long once you have had your operation you will have HAD breast cancer.It is a bit of a roller coaster but it is doable. Try to take it one step at a time if you can and be kind to yourself.Please do NOT look on Dr Google as he is often out of date or just plain wrong.Hopefully your Breast Care Nurse will have given you some information booklets , but if not these can be obtained free of charge from Macmillan or Breast Cancer Care.I rang and spoke to one of the nurses and she was most helpful and informative. I hope you get your results very soon . Sending big hugs xx Kwissy

Hi ,

Sorry to hear your news and I appreciate how difficult it is. 

The news is a lot to take in and then you have the additional worry and anxiety of telling your loved ones. 

I was diagnosed at the age of 34 and like yourself it came out of nowhere. No matter how strong a person you are getting this news naturally is difficult to get your head around. My advice would be to take each day as it comes. 

I felt emotional but the hardest part for me was dealing with the emotions of others. I am a couple of months in from having my surgery and because I spent so much time avoiding dealing with my emotions I am really struggling. My advice would be to take some time for yourself to process the news. 

Take each day as it comes as you will have a lot of information given to you and it’s a lot to take in. I think you will have more clarity once you have your results and I know waiting is the hardest part. Once you know your treatment plan you will be able to plan and get organised. 

Know that you are not on your own and we are all here to support you. 

Sending love xx

Hi Kwissy thank you so much, im taking each day as it comes like you said, things are more treatable now than they were years ago, and certainley agree with you r.e Dr Google, im listening to my body a lot more now, and resting when i need to , and exercising as i used to, and eating better.... im taking my emotions as they come as well, i have my MRI on the 10th November and biopsy on the 2cnd November, its my birthday end of november, happy 47th birthday, at the end of last week my other son also told me they are expecting again so two babies in one week on top of my not so good news, that has given me something to look fwd to though, i will ask for the leaflets, i have done a lot of reading on here, and the right websites. Work has been really supportive too, so i am quite lucky, hope to keep chatting xxx

HI Ni 1 thank you so much for your kind words, age 34, what a shock for you, i found telling the boys hardest, as i am a single mother, even though they are in there 20s i still have two at home, work has been supportive and have sorted time around my shifts as i work in the NHS as a mental health nurse, i find myself thinking i should know how to deal with my emotions however dealing with this has been the worst to deal with, its in the hours of the night when your on your own and awake that it hits, but like you suggested i am taking each day as it comes, i am listening to my body and what it needs right now, resting when i need to , exercising, and eating properley, and learning to say no to people and there expectations on me, which is something i have never done, i think this group is really good, and its good to know that there are and is support for each other. i have my MRI on the 10th November and 2cnd november biopsy results, but this week is busy so it will go quick........ it will be good to chat to others going through similiar experiences. big hugs to you xxxxx

Looks like we are on a similar time frame. I also have a birthday at the end of November and I will be 59. (Going on 36) 

Good luck with the MRI. I will be watching out for your posts.

Debs x

Hi joanofarc

Sorry that you find yourself here but as you have seen there is lots of support on this site from lovely people who have been through or are currently going through this nightmare. It is totally understandable that you are finding it all so hard. I am also a generally sensible and positive person but this is something on a level that we have never experienced. Everyone will tell you that you are at the hardest stage when waiting for results and a treatment plan. I am further down the line from you - two and a half weeks post-surgery and still playing the waiting game as I don't yet have results from surgery. Initially I simply did not believe that I could ever feel better about my situation but gradually I started to have a few more positive moments and began to be able to think about and deal with other things going on in my life. At the moment I feel as if the highs and lows have become even more extreme but the good and positive side of this is that when I am at the top of the emotional rollercoaster I feel like the pre-diagnosis me. I can only say to be kind to yourself and give yourself time and gradually you will feel better.

And you are so right that the hardest part of this whole thing is telling your children. My three are all in their 30s but I can honestly say that telling them is the hardest thing that I have ever done in my life. And that does take a huge emotional toll on us when we are already feeling extremely vulnerable. And certainly for me, it knocks me right back when I can see the fear in their eyes or hear it in their voices when they ask me questions. We all want to stay strong for our families and we do a lot of our crying and worrying in private - some will say that is wrong but I have always been a very private person, so it definitely has to be the way for me.

You certainly seem to have taken on board all the right things of being kind to yourself and taking each day and emotion as it comes. We really can only get through one day at a time at the moment. Look for sensible advice and try to focus on the positives.

Hope all goes well with your treatment.

Hi ,

Hope it your MRI goes well and I’m glad you don’t have long to go before you get your results. I turned 35, 5 days after my surgery and although everyone made a fuss I didn’t feel like celebrating. It was hard telling my family as I am as they all say the strong one. I always felt like I had to keep it together for them so didn’t really deal with my own emotions.  Still have my good and bad days but it’s nice to know there are others that have been in similar situations who you can talk to. Let us know how you get in. Sending hugs xxx

thank you Debs im blown away by all the support and im here also for you if you just want to chat about normal things, if there is such a thing these days. xxx enjoy your birthday. x

Hi ladies, I’m new here and have just found the site and your post. I will follow intently!
i’m in a similar position having had a roller coaster of the last 2 and a half weeks, I had a routine mammogram (age - a very young 54), called 2 days later asking me to attend the breast screening centre to repeat it. Found myself having mammogram, ultrasound, biopsies in 3 areas of my small and now very painful right breast which is bruised beyond belief. Returned on Wednesday last week to be told I have widespread dcis, medium and high grade and the only treatment is total mastectomy. Im in complete shock. I have a consultant appointment on Monday 2nd so I should know more then.

I have read around dcis as much as possible being an ex nurse but would appreciate any advice regarding questions to ask on Monday.

Thanks in advance 

S

Hi 

The only bit of advice I would give with my very limited experience is that the actual appointment is only a part of the session. The breast nurses are available for any questions you may have after the appointment so there is no pressure to remember all you want to know or say. 

In my experience they are extremely supportive and will be a huge resource through this journey.

Good luck with your appointment on Monday. We are here for you  

Debs