I feel like such a whimp.

You are not alone. I feel the same. I'm still waiting for my operation. But we aren't whimps. We are dealing with something really big for us and we are allowed to feel how we feel. Everyone here on this group will tell you the same thing. I hope the chemo goes well. I don't know if I need it yet but I will be on this forum for advice and support if I do. Take care.

Kaza,thank you for your reply. It's good to know that I'm not alone with these feelings. I hope you hear about your surgery soon and that it goes smoothly x

No one fighting cancer is a wimp. You are fighting the battle you were given to fight. And you have every right to be scared, worried, sad, angry, etc. Whatever you feel is valid. Don't invalidate your feelings for any reason. 

You are a warrior. 

Evening,

You're not a wimp!

I had a right hemicolectomy last March followed by three months of CAPOX.  The operation was a walk in the park compared to the chemo.  
I had days where I would look at my capecitabine pills and I would plead with myself not to take them. I always did but that’s where I was.  The Oxaliplatin infusions were, in themselves, ok.  But the side effects of cold touch and first bite and a few other things were horrible. 
I’m not really sure I fought it, I just stuck it out as there was no other choice.  

Just hang in there.  Is it 4 sessions of three weeks?  

You’re not a wimp!

Paul

Thank you for your reply Wingnut.

I've got 8 3 week sessions. 

Wow, definitely not a wimp!

That’s what I was prescribed but I could only take four!  I’m the wimp. 
Stick it out if you can.  I’m constantly thinking I should have bit the bullet and stuck with it.  If it comes back, I’ll be kicking myself. 

You are absolutely not a wimp. Don't be so hard on yourself, cancer treatment is not easy particularly chemo.

I had no issues ahead of my surgery I just wanted it done and my recovery was fine but I found chemo so daunting - in some ways the thoughts of it was worse than the actual treatment.

I had 8 cycles and you'll be supposed how quickly you get into a rhythm of the cycles and can predict when your good days and bad days will be. It's not an easy road but you'll get through it.