Recent diagnoses, total limbo and panick attacks thinking the worse

Hi Stjimmy27  Many here will tell you that the waiting and not knowing is the worst bit. Once there is a plan of action and you know what your are facing, however unwanted, things are easier to cope with.

It sounds as if you have some of the jigsaw pieces (MRI scan, CT scan) in place already ,with probably just the results  from the biopsies still to come. In my case, it was obvious to the person doing the colonoscopy that what I had was a cancerous tumour, so the MDT team went ahead and considered my case based on the photos of the tumour before they got the full biopsy results back, and pencilled me in for surgery straight away. I'll keep my fingers crossed that you also get to hear soon what the suggested treatment plan is.  

What you need to keep reminding yourself of is that these days colon cancer is very treatable - for some of us (me included), it's just an operation to remove the offending piece of bowel, reattach the ends and no more treatment is needed - just monitoring for the next five years .  

Thank you, these days have felt long and hellish, trying to be positive but the just breaking down when everyone is in bed, my mind racing and not able to sleep. It’s exhausting

Hi Stjimmy27 you are in the hardest part in my experience,  when it is all so unknown and scary. I had my colonoscopy 14th December,  told the it was cancer,  CT and MRI followed, biopsies and MDT. Not sure how I got through Christmas,  thinking it was probably my last, breaking down in bed at night. Am 53.

All I can say is hang on in there. It's a very treatable, often  slow growing cancer. I am due an operation next week, then possibly chemo if lymph nodes involved.  It sounds like things are underway for you with scans etc. 

Sending a hug, keep posting if it helps, I have gained such support from people here. Also if the anxiety is too much, see your GP who can help xx

Your youth is absolutely on your side here and you are going to get through this and come out stronger. Bowel cancer is really, really treatable in 2025. The absolutely scariest bit is when it’s all completely new to you and you don’t know the details or the plan, which is where you are now, and I really feel for you.

I don’t think anything anyone can say will stop the absolute somersaults and what ifs that your mind will be doing, but I imagine all of us here would tell you that knowledge and facts are much easier to handle than fear and worry. You will be in that position soon and it feels much better! I was where you are at the very start of September and although it’s been a very strange time of operations and chemotherapy and scans and blood tests, four and a half months later I no longer have any evidence of bowel cancer and although there may be something lurking in my lung, I have 100% confidence that the NHS will sort me out like they already have done.

You ate in the best hands and I’m sure your husband and girls will be there to hold you safe when you feel small. They are going to have to see mum a bit differently for a while, but they will cope beautifully and your bond with them will grow much stronger.

We will try to be here for you too, as people who are all on our similar journeys. 

Take Care. It’s going to be a bumpy ride, but you are not alone.

Nic x

Thank you so much these messages today have really helped. I’m not sure I’ve ever been more frightened in my life xx

I totally agree with everyone else.  The part you are currently at for me was bar up there on the worse experience of my life.   Just in November.  Don't Google anything.  Everyone on here told me not to and it was probably the best advice I could have been given. The NHS is amazing and from my experience you will get a call as soon as the MDT has discussed your case a plan will already be in place for you.  Also in my experience colon cancer is very easy to treat.  

I only have one daughter but she got me through this.  As parents we protect by pretending everything was ok.  I can honestly say by the time I met the surgeon I believed what I had been telling my daughter.  

️xxx

In your circumstances, if you ask your GP they will probably give you some sleeping tablets (Zopiclone) for short term use. Mine did in the past when I was waiting for results and could not sleep and they helped me out but I know they are very strict about prescribing them.

I hope everything works out for you 

Reposting as I put this in the wrong part of the thread...In your circumstances, if you ask your GP they will probably give you some sleeping tablets (Zopiclone) for short term use. Mine did in the past when I was waiting for results and could not sleep and they helped me out but I know they are very strict about prescribing them.

The waiting is definitely tricky, and zopiclone certainly helped me.

I have three sons, and we decided very early on to be transparent with them about what was going on, and.to try and explain everything to them. This helped them, their mum, and me too, and to be honest they've been complete rockstars through the whole thing.

They took it in turns to accompany me to chemo, and it was brilliant having them there. 

This may not be right for everyone, but it demystified and normalised a lot of scary stuff for them.  They also insisted on naming my stoma...

Good luck!

Not knowing is the worst! Your mind invents hundreds of terrible scenarios, each worst than the last. It feels like all of these scenarios are happening at once. But in reality, there will only be a single path. 

Once you have a treatment plan in place, you'll know which path you are on and it won't be nearly as terrifying. 

When they found my tumor, no one could tell me what kind of cancer i had. The biopsy was indeterminate and the tumor filled my pelvic cavity... it could have started anywhere. It was the worst month of my life. 

Once we identified the cancer and put a plan in place, I was so much calmer. I knew what I had to do. I rearranged my life to accommodate the plan and life went on. It quickly became my new normal.  

Hold on, it gets better (though never completely easy)