Anyone there ?

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Tough going and I am not the same anymore 

  • Hi, I am new here, here if you want to chat?

  • I'm not too good at the moment. Feeling a little overwhelmed. How are you?

  • Sorry had stuff to do last night so bit busy anyway sorry your not good where are you in your journey if you don’t mind? 

  • Hi there, I'm new here too, summoned up to write my cancer essay last Saturday after glass of red ( rare these grim cancer days!), but nothing since. It is indeed tough going & I,  too am " not the same anymore ". My oncology nurse indeed said " you'll never be the same person you were before the cancer". We aren't are we?! I struggle too though most wouldn't know it! Where are you with diagnosis/ treatment? It's the uncertainty of prognosis I battle with...

  • Overwhelming it is, feel the same constantly but put on great facade! Where are you in diagnosis and treatment if you don't mind me asking? I've written my grim cancer summary previously that explains this past tough year for me. Keep having a 'nice heart', so important! Take care x

  • It is tough going and thats a fact, you are not the same and never wil be. 

    But is that a bad thing? 

  • Agreed. I am a very different person now, in some ways better.

    Sarah xx


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  • Hi  Yes it’s not easy is it? I’m attaching a link to a paper that a lot of people have found helpful and there’s also a Life after Cancer page where you’ll see that you’re not alone in how you’re feeling 

    https://www.workingwithcancer.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/After-the-treatment-finishes-then-what.pdf

     Life after cancer forum

    I presume you’ve finished active treatment as you’ve had your stoma reversed? The reversal does take several weeks/months to settle down and you’re unlikely to go back to how you were pre-op but I hope you’ll have a look in the stoma board as Sarah has suggested?

    I hope the paper will help you with how you’re feeling - the finishing treatment stage brings about a whole new set of emotions and the absence of regular hospital visits felt like my comfort blanket had been taken away from me. Time is a great healer and each clear scan will help you move on with your life - there’s some great posts from the Highlander on the Life after Cancer board.

    Please keep talking - there’s lots of people on here who know exactly what you’re going through and the support desk is also available if you want to chat to someone in person?

    Take care

    Karen x

    Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm
  • The 'bad thing' is  having this awful disease and treatment in the first place for us all, obviously. We are forever changed (& more quietly anxious re prognosis certainly for me), not the same person we were before, but it is not entirely a bad thing for sure. I know it's made me strongly reevaluate every aspect , gain greater perspective on everything and have heaps more gratitude for everything I do have. We all take things for granted, especially our fragile health, and I no longer do that. Another positive is learning to not focus on things we can't control and learning who we can truly rely on, making those relationships so much stronger. And the other positive is a stronger ( sometimes black and inappropriate! ) sense of humour that has grown and is essential to getting through, many a funny time has been had in the worst year of my existence, even in hateful chemo sessions. Me and that days 'support person' were frequently the most inappropriate pair in there, but whatever gets you through! So  there are always positives even in the depths of hard times I've found x