Well, today is a little bit `reflective` for me as it would have been my husband Jay's 70th Birthday. A milestone I hoped he would see with us here on earth but sadly not to be. This time last year his bowel cancer was really beginning to take a grip on him and he couldn't really celebrate his birthday properly but I said at the time to him to never mind that we would have a big celebration this year for his 70th when he got better. Little did we know then that last year would have been his last birthday on earth and he wouldn't see his 70th.
He was never one for a lot of fuss and his birthdays would just come and go but he would celebrate them in his own quiet way which would have probably consisted of us going out for dinner somewhere he was not much of a `party animal` but each to their own. Some of you here have followed my journey with Jay and his cancer battle and it has been good to come here and share my thoughts and feelings with you as many I have bonded with here are all going through the same thing or similar and it's good to have that if I feel down and just want to check in with you all to see how you are and many have appreciated me coming on to lend my support. It's the little things like this that I will miss that and Valentines Day coming up also because that and his birthday were only two days apart we used to make it a double celebration. I just hope he is up there in heaven and having the best day as possible celebrating his 70th with other family members and friends who are there with him.
Vicky x
I worry about my husband. He is good mostly then I look at him sometimes and he is crying.
I hope to make 70. For him. I am 67 and just getting started in the fight.
Not sure who its harder for. The one with the cancer, or the one left behind.
Take good care. 
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