I feel a bit of a fraud joining this group as I had surgery 12 days ago to remove my ascending colon. I'm now back home and recovering well.
It was all a bit of a whirlwind and it has felt all along like it was happening to someone else, still does.
Can't get my head around it.
Sorry if I seem ungrateful, I'm not, just totally disoriented.
Is this common?
Hello GrahamT
Welcome to the Online Community. I am sorry to see that you had a diagnosis of colon cancer and have had surgery to remove part of your colon. I am pleased that you are now back at home and recovering well.
You are absolutely not a fraud. Being diagnosed and then going through treatment can feel like a bit of a whirlwind and sometimes its only afterwards when you are feeling a bit better and have time to sit and think- the processing starts and your thoughts and feelings can catch up with you. That was my experience. I still feel some days that it has happened to someone else, like you are on the outside looking in. Disorientated is a good description.
Its a big thing- cancer and then surgery and in my experience you don't just bounce back to normal. You are also recovering from a big operation. My advice is just to go with the flow- there is no right or wrong way to feel. Listen to your body and do what it is telling you to do. Rest when needed and reach out to those around you and on here when you feel the need. Your body and mind need time to heal.
Please do ask if there is anything else you need support with. Hopefully by sharing your experiences with others on here it will help.
I wish you the best for the rest of your recovery.
Jane
That's good. I get what you are saying. I understand the guilt feeling- I saw my oncologist for the first time on a Friday lunchtime and had surgery on the Monday morning- however- it's clinical need and sometimes we can not control what is happening to us and the other patients. I think all feelings are valid- I have felt shock, upset, numbness, anger, fear, guilt, and am now working on processing it all. I find this hard as I am at the check up stage and have to be seen 3 monthly so it's never far from your mind. I think sometimes the speed in which it all happens- you just don't have time to "feel" it all but then when things are calmer you still need to go through all those feelings.
Please let us know if there is anything else we can help with
Hoping your recovery goes to plan
Jane
