Happy Birthday Vicky

Thank you so much Karen. Much appreciated. Not been a great start unfortunately tears all round because Jay hasn't been able to get me anything and he now thinks he's `a burden` on me because there's things, he can't do for himself just now. He had to wake me at 3 this morning because his stoma bag had burst, and I had to give him a hand. And now he's in a bit of a state because he hasn't even been able to get me a card. He's now talking about `going` and I asked where and he said `doing himself in` but I know he doesn't mean it. He tried and failed a couple of years ago which I didn't know about which he finally told me and it was all down to being overworked and now he is saying he should just have `finished the job` when he had the chance. I'm going to have to try again to get him some help I think. Thanks again.

Vicky x

Happy 60 th Birthday ! Hope you have a special day .

And big shout out to Kareno62 for putting this up .

Court 

Thank you so much court.  xx

PattyK oh Vicky I’m so sorry to hear he’s feeling like this. I think they can get so down that the little things become enormous and then pile onto the existing worries. Could he maybe write you a nice birthday ‘letter’? Could you think of something he could order online or he could choose from a few things then it would be a surprise? Will William be popping in? If so perhaps he could pick up a card on Js behalf? It’s a delicate line between saying ‘here’s what you could have done’ and giving him some options to relieve his guilt?

You know that the support desk is here for you but you could maybe ring the Samaritans too for their thoughts and advice even if J doesn’t want to speak to them

Sending you a big hug and hope my birthday message wasn’t too tactless

Take care

Karen x

Thanks Karen!

He has said that I should just choose something for myself, and he'll pay for it he always does this anyway by his own admission he says he's rubbish at picking presents and that's a woman's job. William is at work today, but he did phone to wish me Happy Birthday. I'm a step ahead of you there Karen with the Samaritans I contacted them myself last night because I feel I am struggling a bit. Jay won't talk to anyone I said to him this morning and he's flat refused so I can't force him. I gave him a big hug and said in no way was he to think he was a burden on me. He wants away from this house altogether now to live somewhere else. I mentioned a couple of weeks ago about moving into the sheltered complex where my sister is just along the road and that is being processed at the minute but as you know these things can take time and sometimes it's only when and if properties become available. God forgive me but if anything happened to him I really don't think I could live here too many painful memories. Thanks again Karen.

Vicky x

Happy birthday Vicky, hope you had a great day xx

Thanks Cath x