Hi

FormerMember over 3 years ago

2 replies
170 subscribers
611 views

A year ago my brother had what he thought was gallstones. He had a colonoscopy and straight after the procedure he was told he had bowel cancer and without any symptoms was told he had it for over 5 years.

A CT scan the following day showed it had spread to his liver and lungs. He was told it was terminal and has 2 years to live.

He has had a over 18 sessions of chemotherapy. My brother has ran marathons, went to the gym daily and was a healthy eating fanatic.

He is due to run the London marathon in October and has raised a huge amount of money.

My family have been destroyed but this. Advice of how to cope

FormerMember over 3 years ago

My parents have been married for 45 years. Childhood love. Our family is so close. However I can see the stress my parents going through. It’s breaking them.

court over 3 years ago in reply to FormerMember

So sorry to hear about your brother ! That is a very difficult situation he is enduring !
How has he been responding to treatment ? Has he managed to get some stability or shrinkage ?

It is very difficult when cancer spreads to other organs and it really depends how extensive the spread is . If you click on my user name you can read how my mum navigated a spread to her liver first then her lung . But she responded to treatment !

If that occurs then the two years can actually be a lot longer than they first anticipated. Unfortunately some people don’t get that response.

Do you know about his cell type ? Sometimes it’s helpful to know about this to live up in your head what options are available to use further down the road !
https://bowelcancerorguk.s3.amazonaws.com/Publications/TreatingAdvancedBowelCancer_BowelCancerUK.pdf

This is a good read for longer term management of a stage 4 cancer !

Also Macmillan has a helpline 0808 808 0000 and the nurses would be able to chat through with you resources that you and your family could link in with to assist you to cope !

For me I got a very pointed chat from my sister . Whilst my mum had treatment options she was living with cancer and until the Drs said there were no other options we would then consider it a terminal situation. It is painful and I found I grieve for my mum whilst she was still alive . This horrible knowledge that they have a life limiting condition and all that it brings . However she did respond and I have to learn to stop grieving and tentatively learn to take it one day and one step at a time .
Bowelbabe writes a column in the Sun that is worth following where she deals with the reality of a stage 4 bowel cancer diagnosis but also gives some very good advice on how to live life around treatments !
Can I just say your brother sounds an amazing person . Running the London marathon during treatment is outstanding!
I can see from your position you are in mental anguish for your parents too . Trying to anticipate how to meet everyone’s needs around you and I am sure not having time to catch your own breathe !

Can I just say stage 4 cancer is a marathon and definitely not a sprint ! If he is able to continue running like that he sounds as though he is coping well at the moment so it is a good plan to put some support structures around your well-being and your parents! Macmillan helpline will be able to assist with that !

I am around and happy to listen at any time it’s just too much to process . You are also welcome to PM me if it helps .

Take care ,

Court

Helpline Number 0808 808 0000