Feel as if I'm being too calm

I am having the same feeling as you. But I’m probably 8 weeks ahead of you. Has your consultant ruled out that the tumour isn’t a “signet ring” variant which may change the treatment plan

Hi . I was exactly the same! I don’t think there’s any right or wrong way to act. One of my husbands favourite expressions is ‘it is what it is’ and I just sort of adopted that attitude. You cannot change your diagnosis so I just decided to get on with it and bish, bash, bosh the tumour. It may have been denial - maybe still is a bit - but if thats your way of dealing with it then good for you. I can’t say I ever crashed - there were down days and days of feeling sorry for myself and wondering if things would ever get back to normal - but no meltdown days. The surgeon told me in my initial meeting that they were treating me with a view to cure so I took them at their word and got on with it. A lot of people dislike the ‘try and stay positive’ advice but my colorectal nurse firmly believed it helped.

Hope the op goes well and there’s lots of people on here going through/been through chemo if you want any support with it

Take care

Karen x

Thanks for your reply. Not sure what a 'signet ring' is....I've stayed away from google lol. On the review letter of my appointment it says biopsy showed it was cancer (adenocarcinoma). The ct showed that the sigmoid colon was thickened but there was no spread elsewhere. Which I'm taking to be a good thing. Will just be glad to get operation over and take it from there. Corona virus is also s#/÷ with having to isolate now for 2 weeks before operation. 

Hope alls been going good with your treatment so far. Even though we know the statistics of getting cancer is 1 in 2. It's still so surreal when they tell you it's you. 

Thanks karen.....I'm a pretty positive person in general. I work as a counsellor so it's all part of the job. So I know mindset is a big part of it. Maybe that's why I feel so calm. Hopefully I'll stay in this wee bubble and not crash. I think it's more peoples reaction when I'm so blasé about it all. Just taking one appointment at a time now.

Hi Glitterball63

I am 5 weeks postop today!! I was very much the same as you!! Been diagnosed, you've told me what Yr going to do so let's get on with it!! Don't get me wrong I've had down days! But I'm more the let's get rid kind of girl!! Bit of a set back I was hoping to be able to get away without chemo but not to be!! Start chemo this week!! Roll on 3months time!!! My only wish now is to be able to wear my normal clothes! Finding it uncomfortable to wear much round my tummy!! But I'm sure that will improve! I often have to remind myself I've had surgery!! Lol hope all goes well!!!

Take care

Pauline

It’s a more aggressive variant they should check for it before they start your treatment plan as Radio doesn’t work with signet ring and makes it worse as it splits the cancer cells into 1000s of micro pieces which are impossible to remove hence accelerating the spread. It’s best to check as my Surgeon Prof Tekkis (Royal Marsden) has been researching and writing about this for years. 

My initial diagnosis was Adenocarcinoma too but the cancer was determined as the signet ring variant following a further biopsy 2 weeks after the initial diagnosis.

Don’t want to worry you just sharing my experience.

Thanks for your reply. I guess we just have to take one appointment at a time as we dont know what set backs we'll have along the way. 

Good luck with the chemo.....just think of it as an extra blast to get rid of those pesky cells. 

Since my diagnosis I've been non stop eating lol before that I'd lost 3 stone doing intermittent fasting over 2 years. So ive started back on my fasting today. I'm a big believer that if we look after ourselves we feel better and in turn look better. But yes we do have to also remind ourselves that our bodies have been through alot and we need to go easy on ourselves.

Good luck over the next 3 months

Thanks for the info.....always good to have a bitta knowledge from someone who has been though it. I'll put it in my notebook of questions to ask - see that's my practical side kicking in lol 

Lucky you being close to the royal Marsden. They do amazing research. Hopefully northern Ireland will be keeping up with all the amazing breakthroughs they have. 

They found a growth in my colon when I had my colonoscopy on Thursday - or rather didn't have it. I did wonder why it took so little time: they couldn't get very far. I have a scan on Tuesday, and then I'll know that the next stage is. Like you I feel strangely calm, though I do have interludes of sobbing when I think of my family. My daughter was here this weekend, and my grandson was unwell, so we decided it wasn't the moment to tell her. My wife was amazed that I was able to carry on as normal, but strangely I found it easier to live in the moment, and, maybe like you, I still have no symptoms - except, now, the predictable effect of having to give up my usual high-fibre diet (that's another topic, but I really thought I ticked all the boxes for not getting this form of cancer!). I feel it's harder for my wife, and will be harder for my daughters. But my wife soon became her usual forward-looking self: 'well, are we going to buy that campervan now?' So like you I 'm going to try to be practical and positive.

After my diagnosis ( like you no symptoms) I was running on adrenalin and apart from the occasional meltdown I was almost excited, and certainly looking forward to the operation - it was most odd. The rest of the family were worried out of their mind but not me. Corona Virus did not help of course and I even had 5 days of MRSA shower gel prior to admission to hospital. My op was on the 10th May, a left hemicolectomy and I left hospital on day 6. It was stage 3 but no spread elsewhere. But today, 3 weeks after the op I am still so drained, I am sleeping 1 or 2 hours more a night and ready for a nap in the afternoon as well. I'm trying to eat like a horse but still not gaining even the weight I lost in hospital. With a few tiny scars and just 10 days or so of anti blood clotting jabs to go I am beginning to feel a bit of a fraud as people run around me.....It's obviously going to take me longer to get back on my feet than I allowed for - I thought the surgeon was exaggerating when he told me to take things slowly....Thank heavens for on line shopping and home deliveries