After the operation

Hi Jametta,

Im happy to hear your son is through surgery & seems to be out the other side... 

He has had a lot to take on emotionally, physically, mentally & spiritually with diagnosis, surgery & a stoma (I don’t have one myself as luckily they were able to avoid giving me one during surgery) the mental anguish alone can be really a lot to bear... & the endless questions of why things are happening &’what is GOING to happen or come next? Sometimes crying & emotional release is the best thing for someone as it releases the stress from the body. His built up emotions have nowhere else to go & so are being released...

Does he have a treatment plan? Or chemotherapy etc? 

I find meditation is really helping me... Just searching & Listening on YouTube helps me get through some days... There are all kinds of great ones available non any subject. (I’ve even done a healing cancer cells one, or a ‘chemotherapy’ one) 

He probably feels a bit helpless that all this is happening & he has no control over any of it (including the prospect of now living with a stoma) 

Some mindful meditations on living in the moment, surrender & acceptance might be a start.

This can be a long process & some people can take a long time to Coke to grips with any of this (& some also may not be able to accept which is also a process... It’s not an easy road, But a necessary one...

Wishing all the best for your son & you,

Suzy 

Hi , not sure if this link will work , but the paper is by Dr Peter Harvey. Very well worth a read! Helped me then, and still now. 

www.workingwithcancer.co.uk/.../After-the-treatment-finishes-then-what.pdf

Oh thanks Gemmary!

I, too will read this!

Thank you!

Suzy

Thank you very much for your understanding reply, Suzy . This will be helpful.

Thank you Gemmary, I've just read this and there's such a lot that is very relevant to my son's situation. I will keep it to refer to in the future .

Hi and glad to hear that your son is recovering well. Cancer treatment throws up a whole load of emotions - fear, relief that treatment has been a success, worry about the future, frustration that you’re physically and emotionally depleted, why me feelings, fatigue from endless nights in hospital, relief at being home, multiple tablets to take etc. It can get overwhelming at times and I used to get depressed and just want to get back to feeling like ‘me’ again but it all takes time and 4 weeks in hospital will have taken a lot out of him. 

Its good to hear that he’s managing the stoma bag well and hopefully it’s starting to settle down as the first few weeks can be a bit erratic. He’ll quickly get into a routine of when’s the best time to change it and how different foods can affect things. 

I’ve attached a link to a booklet about life after the operation which you might like to take a look at? https://bowelcancerorguk.s3.amazonaws.com/Publications/LivingWell_BowelCancerUK.pdf

Have you also considered ringing the nurses on here? They are here for both of you to talk to on 0808 808 00 00 

Please feel free to post any time on your sons behalf and I hope he starts to feel a bit better in himself soon

Take care

Karen x

Thank you very much Karen.  I will have a look at this booklet, which looks as if it will be helpful.    I am new to this forum,  and I appreciate the support I'm already finding here.