Not sure what way to turn.

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I’m so lost and low, my husband had his bowel surgery over a month ago and it went wrong, what followed was a catalogue of disasters. I’m so lost without him, I’m struggling mentally and financially. I’m exhausted.

The poor man has been through so much and he’s still seriously ill. He will never be the man he was when he went in for this surgery they have told us. When I see him it makes me cry. This is very rare to happen I must add. I may now have to move house into a more suitable house, I’m just in shock. I don’t know who to talk to, I’m keeping strong for my daughters, but I feel I need to speak to someone also. I’m just in shock with all this. I can’t get my head around it. I watch him every day cry in pain and he’s so very depressed. No one is supporting him.

Rosie13 1 month ago

My son is the same his surgery for bowel cancer was in Match last year and didn't go well he has a stoma which isn't any bother at all but they cut through his ureta during the operation and he now has a nephrostomy drain in his kidney. He will need another operation in 3 months but he is getting better. Things will get better for your husband but it does take time. Try and stay positive and use this group I have found it really helpful. Good luck l hope things improve xx

Kareno62 1 month ago

Hi honey bea I’m so sorry to read that things have not gone well for your husband. Please give the support desk a ring on the number below - they will be able to listen and advise you on any financial help and also see if there’s any local support groups that you could attend?

Ive just read your previous posts on other boards and you’ve been through an awful ordeal with it all - I really hope your husband can pull through this and you can get him home where things always feel a bit better

Take care

Karen x

Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm

Tom143 17 days ago

Hi Bea, I am sorry to hear about your husband. It must be very hard for you to carry the load. I had colon cancer which ended with me having a right hemicolectomy, what I didn't know was because I had immunotherapy and a lot of the immune system is in the stomach that my immune levels were low. I had the pain of the open surgery then I got shingles because my immune system went low, which can happen even if your not on immunotherapy. The pain of single is extremely bad, I never felt pain like it. The shingles follow the nerves in the skin, depending on where it attacks. I had no idea what I had, just pain till I spoke to a doctor who looked and saw a rash and said its shingles. The medication for shingles is varied and take a bit of working out. I don't know if your husband got this like me, but maybe one thing to check.

Tom143 17 days ago

Hi again, here is a link about financial help when someone has cancer, you might had seen about it already, if not check these people out.