Hi all. My experience of being very unwell and leading to eventual emergency surgery that found stage 3 bowel cancer as had spread to lymph nodes, is documented in my bio. I was deemed currently 'cancer free' last year after hideous chemo finished and obviously very relieved. However, know I'm on 'very close monitoring ' for next 4 years as told if 'it' going to come back, likely within that time frame. I have done so well getting on with life since with a new found appreciation and gratitude for life, joking I am now " happy clappy"! I have struggled, however, with the aftermath of what happened and how 'it' was only just caught in time ( was about to be discharged from hospital with a 35cm tumour!), and my amazing oncology team referred me to their health psychologist. She was fantastic and worked hard with me and my ongoing 'health anxiety '. After 10 months of sessions with her I felt strong enough and practice what she taught me. I am facing a daunting post incision abdominal hernia repair surgery next month which will go back in my hemicolectomy and know this will bring up what happened and the recovery will be tough but has to be done as is massive ( joke am full term with triplets!) & the worry has been it strangulating which would be an emergency, etc. So, been waiting for this when got an unexpected call asking me to see a Gynaecologist yesterday. Long story, but after discussing issue , examination and my history, I have now been placed on the 2 week suspected cancer pathway again for this. Facing an urgent procedure to take biopsies and then again having to wait for results. It brings back all the fear, anxiety and uncertainty again I went through previously with my BC. I had so relished living well, really focusing on prioritising my health and wellbeing, feeling the best i have in decades, back working full-time in a position i adore, socialising and being there for my adult children who live with me and were so scared previously when I was so ill and my cancer had spread. My daughter was with me yesterday when told this and immediately cried as did I. We're so impacted by what has happened and never expected this uncertainty again so soon. I am hoping so much this won't be cancer again but am so scared and trying desperately not to overthink it all but when we've already been through this, it's so very hard isn't it.
