I posted on forums here and on outher cancer help sites for information to no avail.. All I can find is information that elderly persons. Even those with stage one who don’t have surgery will survive only 6/8 months . This is so scary is there anyone on here who has this or has a family member who survived far beyond this brief time . I am driving my self mad with worry that I will lose my sweetheart before the year is out He is only 81 and also has mid stage dementia.
Hello Wisper
Welcome to the Bowel forum.
I am so sorry to hear that your husband has had a diagnosis of cancer and is also living with dementia. It must be a very worrying time for you both. I am glad that you have felt able to reach out to others on the Online Community.
Prognosis is always a difficult thing to answer as there are so many different factors and only his consultant would have all these details. When searching online the figures that are often stated are not particularly accurate or up to date and they don't take into account any other medical details.
I can understand how worried you must be- has he got a CNS that you can talk things through with? What about the consultant? or even his GP.
Prognosis, even for experienced doctors can be hard to determine and at best it is an educated guess. Stages and grades of cancer will affect it but also any treatments that he may have now or in the future. Grades are important because some cancers tend to grow more slowly than others. So for my own cancer although I was lower stage, I was high grade- so I needed aggressive treatment. So for me it would have quickly spread without treatment- however if I had a lower grade cancer- it would likely grow much slower and take months/years to spread. The stage at diagnosis is also important.
For me I know my outlook would not have been great without the treatment but no one could know for sure how long it would take for the cancer I had to start to spread. For me, knowing my prognosis at the time would not have been helpful as I needed to remain positive and to focus on my treatments and I would only have worried more.
I wonder if it might be worth talking things through with someone on the Support Line? You could talk through what is happening with your husband and maybe find out if there is some support in your local area for you both. You could also talk through the support you are already getting for your husband and they would be able to go through what other services you may be able to access.
I hope this helps a bit and that you can find the answers you need from his team.
In the meantime we are here if you need us.
Jane
Hi wisper
I understand and I hope that you have more time together than you are thinking.
Sometimes people can and do have longer than expected and can live with cancer for sometime.
My feeling is to talk quietly to one of his Macmillan nurses and see how they feel he is doing day to day and from that talk about what they may feel is coming up and how they can best support both of you.
Jane
