My husband has an ostomy bag due to cancer. He has had his bag for 8 months now. He empties his bag into toilet and when he does it sprays everywhere. I’m talking hitting the walls, the floor, the tub. I am constantly cleaning the bathroom. I have asked him to at least clean up after he empties, have left easy to access cleaning supplies and antibacterial sprays by the toilet but he won’t clean up. The nastiest part of this is that he won’t wash his hands after he empties his bag. I have seen him empty bag then walk in kitchen, touching food and surfaces . Quite frankly it is disgusting and myself and my daughter are at risk of picking up a bacteria from his bad hygiene.I’ve lost my appetite and I’m afraid to eat any food not knowing if he has touched it or not. I have told him repeatedly to clean up and wash hands and he does if he knows I can hear him but I have caught him numerous times leaving the bathroom a mess and not washing hands. He is not feeble and is able to care for himself and get around so it’s not a question of whether he can do this or not. I am at the point of asking him to move out because I just can’t deal with his poor hygiene but feel as though I can’t leave a man suffering from cancer. When I do ask him to wash hands and clean up a little he gets angry and sulks for days. He won’t meet with an ostomy nurse either. I am at my wits end.
Hi aidee
It sounds like the poster’s husband has an ileostomy and irrigation is not an option with this.
However, it would be helpful if the type of stoma were clarified.
Sarah xx
Thank you for confirming Tink60 .
I have to say that I agree with court that this is an unacceptable situation you find yourself in, and there is no excuse for it if your husband is mobile and able to manage things himself.
I have a colostomy, which of course is not the same, but in the early days after my (bigger) surgery when I was not able to get out of bed, and had a drainable bag with very loose output I still would not have behaved like this. When I couldn’t move from my bed (I also had my bladder removed at the same time along with the whole of my reproductive system)) I had a bucket by my bed to empty the bag in if I had an emergency need for this due to how weak I was.
Cleanliness and hygiene were a huge priority for us both-so if I had used this bucket, my partner emptied it and disinfected it immediately, wore gloves, and I got cleaned up, even in my bed using “one use” towels and flannels.
I’m so sorry you are having to deal with this-there is really no excuse in my opinion.
Sarah xx
