My husband has just been diagnosed with rectal cancer. He’s only 40 and we have a 4 year old girl and a 7 year old boy. We’re only at the very early stages of this journey still waiting on CT and MRI for staging and treatment plan. I was hoping to find some other parents here to find out how they are coping with all this. I worry constantly about the impact on the kids and what they are going to see their Daddy go through in the coming months and I can’t stop my mind going to a possible scenario where their Dad doesn’t get to watch them grow up. He’s such a fabulous Dad to them and even with the diagnosis he is focusing on spending as much quality time with them while he is still feeling fine. I on the other hand am falling apart and completely overwhelmed by the prospect of having to be the primary carer in the house for everyone. I usually get stressed with juggling childcare, work and home on the rare occasions when my husband is away from home for only a few days. I am so in awe of the way all the carers posting on here are coping with whatever is thrown their way. Hopefully that will come with practice and time.
Hi Scientist44
Sorry to read about your husband, there are indeed plenty of people with young children here, our son was about 6 when my wife was diagnosed in her case Leiomyosarcoma.
Janice never wanted a prognosis and I really struggled with that. I spent quite a bit of effort thinking about how would I cope without her and given she had quite a few hospital stays in her treatment then the school run and the rest became really difficult. Finally I walked in our local Maggies and cried my eyes out. The helped me realise I needed some kind of break and the easy bet was some time off work.
Many find the time between diagnosis and getting the information to make treatment decisions really very difficult indeed so I am glad you reached out on here. If you look at our Carers only forum you will find many great tips and others who have struggled in the past.
You might also like to look at our pages on talking to children and teenagers.as I found that really helpful.
<<hugs>>
Steve
It’s a roller coaster! We have an appointment this week.. hoping for a plan of action… 
I am lead to believe we are heading for neoadjuvant therapy then surgery but the letter was so vague. I hope your husband gets his results and next appointment soon. 
️ Take Care x
Our meeting was with the surgeon. I had all my questions ready but really didn’t get the answers I expected. We weren’t told the size…was told it didn’t matter. Wasn’t told the stage…nor the type..was told once’s removed it would be looked at. Trying to be positive as the cancer hasn’t moved to other areas. This week our meetings are with the chemotherapy team and genetics team due to my husband being young. I am in the uk and I do worry about waiting lists… surgeon did say 12 weeks 
.
Hi Jane1982
He will be able to access it from via his GP . It all gets uploads on the clinical portal .
Most are quite free with this information. Not sure why he was not given it . Great it has not spread but he can call his GP at some point .
Court
Helpline Number 0808 808 0000
Thanks you, my husband doctor actually left 
The tumor is localised but it is threaten an important layer of tissue therefore we believe treatment would be the exact 
. So we plan to ask at the next appointment but right now we are trying to get around the thought of what’s to come.
