I find having this stoma has ruined every aspect of my life , my confidence , work and of course relationships have all suffered .i feel very ugly and depressed. I can never enter into a proper relationship with someone of the opposite sex because of the total mess they have made of my once athletic body . From the very moment they failed to do a reversal 4 years ago i have rarely socialised and cut down on my work by 50%.......No doubt no one wants to read this negativity , but there you have it , the truth.
Hi Longfellow
I think it’s perfectly valid to say how you feel about having a stoma, even if it’s negative because that’s your reality and experience. It’s sad to see how it has affected your life so much, and for such a long time. I have 2 stomas and while I wish I didn’t have either of them, I accept that iI’m only still here because of them, and I want to live my life the best I can.
Doesn’t mean I don’t hate them sometimes and wish I could even have one day without them.
Sarah xx
Hi Longfellow
Sometimes talking isn’t possible. I’ve had moments like that in my life. When my son was in a car accident. Talking wasn’t apt. I had medication and sat by his bed
Maybe writing here helps you release the pain of how you are feeling.
Your children are important in your life. Can you plan some time together. They must be concerned for you
sending you a hug
Ann
Hey
Please check out this group. I had so much help there
community.macmillan.org.uk/.../ileostomy-and-colostomy-discussions-forum
Ann
I do feel that your feelings would be so much better expressed here If it helps you
Ileostomy, colostomy, urostomy and any other stoma support
im not sure anyone would be excited to have a stoma and a huge operation.
You may find Blake Beckford an inspiration.
He’s a model that raises awareness of living with a stoma. The before and after shots speak volumes 
Ann
