Bowel cancer CARERS, FAMILY & FRIENDS chat

As jkee puts it do as you want. 

as you know daughter went to Scotland for the weekend and we had the hamster to look after and before I went to bed on Friday night I put her food in. As you know I was not in a good place and Les said he heard a strange noise during the night. Went to check on her at 7 last night and guess what I had nit closed the top lid and she was not there. OMG I thought. Panic set in again. I got a torch and checked every room about an hour later Les moved his bed which is heave and was in pain but there she was asleep behind it (it sorts of fits in the wardrobes).  She was fast asleep behind and had chewed the wires. Got a bowl and managed to get her back in her own cage. Panic over. At least behind the bed got cleaned and tape around where she had chewed the wires. She is safe and back waiting for daughter to pick her up. My head must have been in the shed on Friday night. Les was shattered and hurting after all the panic. 

thinking of you all xx

Oh no you were lucky to find the hamster I remember when the kids were tiny having a hamster used to find it in the sock drawer you could have done without that drama but you survived and the hamster bless new week tomorrow re we ready xx

Hi all, 

I’m sorry to hijack your thread but was hoping for some advice please? 

My husband was diagnosed with rectal cancer last Nov and has since had a stoma and six rounds of FOLFOX (oxiloplatin and capacetibine). They found mets in his lungs and possibly on the liver. In between this he had a stay in hospital to check his heart as they were concerned the chemo was affecting it, and last week was told he has a pulmonary embolism so he’s now on anti coagulant injections.

Tomorrow we get our scan results to see if/how the chemo has worked and I’m terrified. For the duration of the chemo the pain in his rectum lessened a lot so I was hopeful the chemo was working but the last week or so the pain has come back and he constantly feels the need to go to the toilet, although nothing comes out. Is this common do you know? Could it be inflammation or is it a sign that the tumour has stayed the same? 

Thank you for any advice you can offer. 

Hi Scarlett10. Unfortunately I think all our loved ones suffer differently.  My hubby has had 16 sessions of the same meds and will be have a liver op as it had spread there.  We are all on our different rollercoasters which is horrible. I am pleased you came here as you can let off steam, moan, say what you like. We support each other at different stages.  It is a tough time but please let us all know how you and your hubby are coping. Has he been given a special diet sheet. We will look forward to hearing from you again. This is just a great way with lovely caring people to more or less chat to so you don’t feel so alone. 

Jkee all I can say thank goodness we found the hamster. I am more than careful but hopefully she will be going home tomorrow. If I had not panicked I would have found it funny.

thinking of you all xx

Thank you so much for your reply. 

I feel the same way I did when he was first told they believe he has cancer, following a sigmoidoscopy. The wait to be given scan results and action plan was as you know horrendous. He is bring very stoic as usual but I am an anxious person by nature and so scared of what they will tell us. I am trying to be positive but my days it’s hard. 

Hi SCARLETT10

Sorry you have had to join this group my husband unfortunately had to stop chemo because it effected his heart so we are on watch and wait which is living with a time bomb. I hope you get good results from his chemo the need to go to toilet i think is a problem for them but if you need answers ring his colorectal nurse or team which you should have on his notes I am forever ringing them with questions. Take a list of questions to every appointment. My husband never asked anything it's me doing everything. Your life is different I know mine is I am not the same person anymore just one big worry but please come on here with your thoughts our journeys are all different but we all have that one thing in common. We have even found some laughs on here believe it or not sending hugs xx 

Scarlett Jkee is right ups and downs constantly.

it looks as though he won’t get the op on the 16 as they are leaving it a bit late now, so another rollercoaster ahead. He is in agony with his fissure at the moment. Thank goodness daughter is back today as well as I feel I could do with someone just there as I have felt alone this weekend. They enjoyed themselves with her mother in law. Still feel envious life has stood still. 

hugs to all xx

Thank Jkee. 

You are absolutely right, our lives are not the same and I have changed as a person too. My husband won’t ask questions either, he hates talking about it and side effects etc. as it scares him. I am now an unofficial spokesperson who has to take down and remember information then tell family what is happening. It’s such a horrible hand we’ve all been dealt. 

I am trying to take comfort in knowing that there are lots of treatments for this type of cancer and I hope if this chemo hasn’t worked as well as we want they can offer something else?

Im so sorry that your husband had to stop the chemo, that must have been so upsetting for you. We were lucky that it was just a scare for us but I remember my heart sinking when we told to stop medication straight away until the results from the heart ecg came back. I hope there are more options for you should you ever need them. 

Take care x

Distraught, I get what you are saying, home has become a sort of prison but we chose to limit who we see due to his immune system being low during treatment. It’s still hard as each day is like Groundhog Day but that’s the price we pay to care for the men we love. 

Look after yourself xx

Distraught, I hope your husband gets his op as planned. It sounds like he is suffering god love him and you seeing him in pain must be so hard. I hope you realise how special you are to look after him as you do xx