Bowel cancer CARERS, FAMILY & FRIENDS chat

Hi you can only do your best and try to enjoy Xmas, don’t know what’s happening with Paul whether he will still be in the hospice or whatever. pardon my French but this has been a shite year!!

I could run away

Helen x

Bless you Helen life seems so unfair I often look at people who sail through life and think why us as a family I really hope Paul is with you you are all in my prayers hugs sent to you xx

Gosh Vicky I am so pleased we don’t have neighbours and everyone keeps themselves to themselves but are here if need help. I don’t think I could cope with that at all. I have a stick tree up with some new baubles on. Looks like that will be it for now.  I just don’t have the energy. Went for 24 hour ecg and saw the consultant tonight who said it is fine to have them but try and control my stress levels. That is hard as Les has been awful to me the last 2 days but very tired today and drawn.

jkee it sounds like Les as he is still losing weight.  He is on his 13 session and you can tell it is taking its toll on him.  My stress levels are high that is why the ectopics are bad.  How do we keep calm when we see our loved ones suffering. Still have nothing in for Christmas as I just feel so flat and down. Trying to keep calm when your loved one does not even know he is being awful is so hard. 

helen I hope you are coping.

take care everyone lots of hugs to all Maggie xx

Oh Helen!

I think I can echo just what you said it definitely has been a shit year and I will be glad to see the back of it. Maggie I get it that you feel so flat and down. I have been like this for most of the week I think it is the thought of Christmas looming but I have made an effort with the decorations. Have the wee the one for a couple of hours tomorrow so that will be fun. Mummy and Daddy going to see Santa about someone's presents. Just can't seem to get my head in gear for Christmas at all. It will come and go though as it always does. My best Wishes to you all ladies. Take Care

Vicky xx

Yes it would be lovely to live in the middle of nowhere Maggie where everyone keeps to themselves. Most of my neighbours are fine though and that is what a lot of them do just keep to themselves. My neighbours below me and on the other side of the path are ok they keep telling me if I need anything I know where they are but I always keep thinking I would be putting them out asking. The neighbour I was talking about lives downstairs and through from my neighbour below me. We live in a 4-in-a-block so practically live on top of each other. All our kids used to play together when younger so I've known them about 30 odd years. My downstairs neighbours are fairly new they have only been here about 13 years. The neighbour before them was brilliant I used to socialise with the woman a lot and she was like a sister to me and her oldest son was like a brother to William but her husband decided that they were emigrating to New Zealand. Broke my heart.  So out of the 4 houses its really only me now and `grumpy chops` and his lot who have been here since the year dot. Have a nice weekend. Take Care.

Vicky xx

Maggie so sorry you are struggling Les is superman going through 13 sessions it must be hard for him they say you take it out on the ones you love. Simon is the opposite we are just best friends my right arm  he is still making me smile everyday they are soo brave but he always tells people it harder for me and the kids which I think is true.Just remember you have us to rant to we will keep going talk to family and get help if you need it sending love xx

Helen I am so sad to hear you don’t know whether Paul will be out for Christmas but fingers crossed. I echo it has been a shite year but somehow we manage. 

vicky we don’t live in the middle of nowhere but neighbours are about 40 feet apart. Bought it as it was run down and still not done due to his dad and mum being poorly and now Les. Left with it all undone. I try and not get too stressed about it but this gets me down as well.

jkee I wish Les would say it is hard for me but he is the opposite. A small story.  His sister who is a money grabber and I want nothing to do with her after the way she treat her mum and took her bank card off her during covid and spent between £500 to £700 a month on it not that she knows I know but took copies when she did not turn up. She bullied her and did nothing. As we live over an hour away we could not be there all the time. She sent an email regarding his brother who is schizophrenic to say she bought a new chair and added the receipt bearing in mind she took all the sovereigns worth a canny bit and wants Les to go half and Christmas presents to be sent to her house. My brother took me to the appointment and talking to him he said that if she sends emails just tell Les and don’t read them (Les never looks at emails as I use it for work) as I have to try and keep myself stress free. That is what I am going to do and will tell Les when he is a little better. As my daughter says she is a poor excuse of a human being.  She witnessed his sister bullying his mum and so have we.  I will try from now on to ignore the emails. I was more disgusted she never even rang Les.  Les has not told her about what is wrong with him as she would love it and be down here like a flash. Enough of that conversation.  

1. Please take care everyone and as usual a virtual hug for all xx

There’s nowt so queer as folk and you can’t choose your relatives. His sister sounds an awful person and I can’t understand people like that. Having said that I have been told by Kevin’s sister that “I’m out of the loop” regarding any inheritance from Kevin’s parents who are 92 and 90 even though I was with Kevin for over 50 odd years. My daughter can’t believe that she would say such an awful thing but I will rise above it. Kevin wouldn’t have cared less as he was never bothered about having money so long as we were ok. So there you are!!! 

Just look after your nearest and dearest. I haven’t slept very well so got some tablets to take, spoke to Paul this morning and he seemed brighter.

Helen x

Helen you are so right. I will never speak to her again.  After his dad died the Will of course is null and void. Then his mum said Les could have the stamp albums (64 of them) but she wanted half knowing the cost. His mum got Corbetts in and we had to pay her half, I was fuming as I did not want them but Les was buying stamps for his dad when he was poorly and is now buying bloody stamps. She is so greedy and knows everything. When we paid half she then proceeded to tell her mum that he under valued them and his mum got confused but we did not fork out any more money. Gosh I could go on and on but I like you going to rise above it. I actually can’t understand people like that but karma has a way..

glad Paul seemed a little brighter this morning which will make you feel better. Are the tablets working to help you sleep xx

Morning ladies it feels I have written this myself Maggie and Helen Simon family has done the same all stole from his mum and dad while alive and after death not going to say anymore because I am finding it hard in my head at the moment to deal with the latest just a text saying they are all meeting in Australia for Christmas to surprise his brother who went out after his parents where ill and left it to us not one of them have visited or whatsap or rung to see how Simon is. Simon is just amazing like I don;t want anything from them never have they have to live with what they did he has never been greedy he was the little brother so I am trying to forgive because he wants me to but I really do not want to hear from any of them we are just grateful we have our little family we don't need false people life is easier. Simon reminds me god forgives everyone for their sins but it is not easy love to you all xx