Bowel cancer carers, family and friends chat

Torry do some mindfulness that will help send you off to sleep and don’t drink any tea or coffee after 7.. My thoughts will be with you tomorrow.  I have no words of comfort but we will all be with you tomorrow and thinking of you both. Hugs from Maggie x

Hello. I’m a wife and new to this too. My husband was diagnosed with advanced bowel cancer 7 weeks ago which has spread alot. He had bowel resection and colostomy nearly 5 weeks ago due to bowel obstruction. 
Im finding this emotionally hard as my job is a children oncology specialist nurse !!

we have our oncology app tomorrow. We have already been told it’s not curative - I just need to kneel a plan the waiting is awful 

Hi Helen,

I am so sorry to hear your husbands diagnosis . It is a terrible shock , almost like living in a bad dream. Your medical training must be both a blessing and a curse at present...I'm a vet nurse and sometime find that knowledge is both good and bad when dealing with your own pet.

I'm glad you found this thread, you can come here to vent/ cry/ chat and we are all here to listen. This is an awful place to be but you are not alone here. Us "warriors" are here to support you too. 

Sending you a huge virtual hug

Amy xx

Oh Helen, it sounds like you and hubby must be feeling awful at the moment, like you say its the waiting.  But, although I am not an expert, I would say although not curative, it would be treatable, and I am sure many people have lived for many years after just being treated, so do not give up, as I am sure the Oncologist will do every thing in his power to treat him in the best possible way.  There are no words that can really help you at the moment as your mind is playing havoc, but today will soon be over and at least once you see the consultant, hopefully there will be a plan of action.  x

I reiterate all troopers have said. There are no words.  Try to be positive.  Have a good cry or whatever you need to cope. My hubby has gone for his 3rd lot of chemo this morning. I could not go as I am still coming to terms with it. Our best friend has gone and I feel so guilty not going. My hubby has to take laxatives in case of a blockage and he takes a lot every day.   My thoughts as always are with you all. All my love to you troopers. Maggie x

Good Morning Warriors!

How are we all today? Well hubby been on the phone this morning and said that they are delighted of his progress in getting through this sepsis infection.  They said there is a chance that he could get home by the end of this week. Nothing is certain or been set in stone it will happen but they are just talking about it just now. I receive this news with caution. Not trying to be a `debbie downer` but I would rather they make sure he is over everything before they send him home not that he is just `well enough` to go home they did this one of the other times and he had to be readmitted because the infection was still lingering. I don't want him to come out only to be readmitted again in weeks from now as they have said if he goes back in again, he may just not come back out. I want him home but want him home right. He is still having problems with his stomach and he said they are going to investigate that further today and tomorrow I think he said. They are giving him pain killers for that just now though. He said they work for a while but the discomfort ends up coming back. They've had him sitting up as well he says but its while he's sitting up this discomfort can come on so they need to look into it further. He mentioned something about them possibly putting him back on chemotherapy but maybe only in tablet form. This has not been definitely decided as yet because he said the doctor said they will need to have meetings and consultations on that because a lot will need to be taken into consideration i.e if they do what do they give him and how adverse would side effects be or would there be side effects etc and with his insides being as they are they would need to tread very carefully in deciding this. So at the moment it is a possibility but again not definite or set in stone. Don't know how to feel about all this. I just don't want to get my hopes up on everything and again slapped back down again. I'd love him to be able to get something even if it is in a minimum dose and at least maintaining things if not curing them. I've tested again this morning too and I'm still positive so just need to carry on with that. I don't feel too bad today just a little bit `headachy` and sluggish but ok. Take Care and love to you all.

xx

Patty I would be the same as you. I would want it all sorting before coming out and then you know for sure the infection has gone. He should not be home with you still testing positive as well and you need to be well for him. I hope they get his tummy sorted before he comes out as well. Sending you all big hugs and thinking of us all love Maggie x

Well had community nurse today and palliative doctor and MacMillan nurse. Talked about DNR and now he is wheezing so checked him out as he can’t have a good cough. No infection but think there will be no more chemo although it’s up to oncologist on Thursday. Nurse took us to one side while doctor was examining him and told us it’s probably weeks so of course me and daughter fell apart although we hoping for a better outcome. Next weeks talk is about what happens next as they said it was too much to take in today. Three of us to get him out of the house this afternoon and I managed a walk with him and a coffee.  He is not saying much but nurse thinks it will probably hit him on Thursday so dreading that day too - it’s just not fair we had so many plans. Asked if we require carers yet but said we can manage at the mo although virtually immobile now. Daughter talking about maybe moving in to help but can’t even think about it yet. Sorry for long post but hey needed to get it off my chest xx 

So sorry to hear this Torry

Spend time together ask for what ever you need and want as a family 

make sure you have the meds you need to keep hubby comfortable. That’s one thing I know what to ask for 

thinking of you x

I am so very sorry to hear this Torry, and as always sending you a big hug and your daughter too.

I hope they are able to make your hubby comfortable and please take care of yourself too

You are in my thoughts xx

Amy xx