Bowel cancer carers, family and friends chat

We are all in the same boat but at least we can have a moan and a bit of a laugh over things- what a pity we all don’t live locally as could have met up and had a really good moan.

A friend came over this afternoon for a cuppa in the garden, we used to be close but with pandemic etc and they never bothered when Kevin was ill but let bygone be bygones and it was nice to see her, and it filled a bit of time in for me. 

Not really looking forward to next week being left on my own altogether but will have to get used to it I suppose. There’s some jobs about the place I could do if I really feel like it but will see.

Keep ya spirits up girls - Maggie seems like you will have an awful lot of stuff to sort out at some point, I am just wondering what to do about sports car as insurance due this week but kids want me to keep it for time being although running tow cars really isn’t an option - will see

Paul has been in bed all day feeling poorly so something else to worry about - can’t be doing with him going into hospice etc

helen x

I have a picture in my head of you living in a  Manor with a thousand baubles just think all that stuff your properly sitting on a fortune sounds like he's a hoarder bless you send hugs xx

Helen where do you get your strength from your are so brave and strong what a year please just take 1 hour at a time do not think ahead we are here for you and are thinking of you always xx

Just keep trying to be practical- thought I was more capable than I am though trying to put up a new bracket for hanging basket today and the bit fell out of the drill and lost it so have given up. So basket on the ground til I can come up with a plan. Kevin’s box with all the drill bit that he has had for years now has a empty space with the lost one!! How hard can it be to do!! Will ask Paul to help when he feels a bit better. I dont feel strong emotionally and just read something that made me cry like a baby. It’s just not fair!! All these oldies walking round holding hands and me like Billy no mates now. Moan over and getting the cadburys out

Helen x

Torry that is so sad about Paul. That is all you need more worry. Ask a few friends round for tea or something to keep you occupied. You know how I said it looks like Steptoe and sons the scrap man came round and Les got up and went out so I chucked it.  Came back and played hell as I got rid of a rusty table and a chair on wheels. He was fuming so I actually said something I might regret later.  We had a little argument and he said it is not my default I have cancer and I replied it is not mine either I just would like it tidy.  Saying that he has just made more mess outside. I am fuming. My garden set is full of plants and soil.  Moan over again. 

just take Helen. Love and hugs to everyone xx Maggie 

Oh dear seems like he is going out of his way to annoy you - maybe it’s his way taking it out on you as he is frustrated about his cancer and not being able to do what he wants. Hopefully things will settle down a bit. Maybe when he sleeps you can get rid of other stuff on the quiet without him noticing. This cancer seems to effect people in so many different ways. 
kevin was very positive and was sure he was going to be fine, always looked in the bright side, took whatever came along, never complained or got angry - sounds too good to be true but he was no angel by any means

sometimes it’s good to let off steam

Im not even going to tackle garage or shed full of tools and car equipment have decided kids can sort it after I’ve gone as I wouldn’t know where to start.

love Helen x take care Maggie and a big hug x

Oh dear Maggie! 

And I thought I was bad at hoarding!. You know my sister is like that. She goes out and just buys things for the sake of it. Her bathroom is full of open half used bottles of shampoo shower gels etc. She is always going for these BOGOFs (Buy one Get one free) and she just buys rubbish that she'll never use just for the sake of just buying something. So Jay phoned and they are moving him back up to the urology ward where he was last time. Don't know if that's a good sign but they will be better equipped there to deal with his infection. Going in to see him tomorrow. Wasn't going to even tackle it today as there was a big cup final match on at Hampden football ground in Glasgow not far from where we are. He said his dinner was rubbish tonight and only ate half of it he is eating again now but I think it is just the notorious hospital food they are giving him he's not keen on. If you keep the stuff long enough Maggie you might get on Antiques Roadshow and maybe end up worth a few bob, Take Care. 

Vicky x

I do regret saying it. He has been in the loo since 4 hopefully will be okay. He said he did not feel well yesterday and got up and potted some plants. I have been awake since 4 and now worried about him and really anxious. He is resting on the settee. 

thank you all for your replies. Gosh I feel awful now. Just resting in bed as no point in getting up as I don’t want to disturb him.  

huge hugs all Maggie xx

Morning everyone such a rollercoaster ride for us all hopefully after a good sleep plenty of fluids he will feel better .Simon is very laid back about his cancer he just says I've had a good life he is 56. I think it is soo much harder for us that are watching and hurting as Helen will understand and Vicky and others on here we are only human we fall out say things we don't mean to hugs to every one puppy training this afternoon dreading it my daughter is taking me they think it will do me good and stop him attacking me when he has his frenzy love to everyone 

You are so right Jkee. What a rollercoaster.  He was poorly again and I panicked. I was cleaning the inside windows and bathroom at 6. I can’t settle today. I wish the weather was as nice as yesterday as I would go outside and do the windows. The only thing is we have high ceilings so the windows are high. I am absolutely worried sick. He has never been like this.  Today I regret what I said yesterday and hopefully by tonight he will be brighter. I don’t think I am coping very well at all.

sending huge hugs to everyone. Maggie xx