Wish I'd not had chemo.

Oh Catdad - you're story really is an extremely tough one. I thought I had a bucket load of problems with chemo, but none as scary as your biggies. my heart goes out to you.

Has your specialist team advised you on what they think they can safely do for you now? And have you investigated whether an trials would be suitable for you?

Wishing you all the best

You have certainly been through a dreadful time, and even now you are suffering.  I also went through rotten times of chemo/radiotherapy and to be honest I said to my husband "I would rather be dead than feel so ill", as like you, I was so active, and at one time spent most of my time in bed, and felt so weak and helpless.  Do not give up, I did not, although I felt like it at times. One good thing all the cancer seems to have gone, so that is a positive, so I think you may have to wait and see if and when they can removed the affected part of your bowel.  Try and motivate yourself, even if its a short walk in the garden, just to get some fresh air, talk to friends and family,.  I always saw people worse of than myself, although that is hard to imagine, but its true..any way God Bless you and hope that before too long some sort of decision will be made on your further treatment.

Hi Catdad!

Your issues so much mirror my husband's. He got diagnosed with cancer in July 2021 not long after that he got his bowel resection and now has a permanent stoma. His tumour operation went ahead in January 2022 after a successful course of chemoradiation again like yourself. They got all his cancer and was told no further chemo was needed- even though I asked as a precaution as sometimes stray cells can linger. Five months down the line and well, it was back!! This time it was inoperable. Chemo started again mid August last year but round about the 4th cycle (CAPOX) it had to be stopped because he felt really ill after sailing through the first 3 cycles. So he had to have a break then round about October/November they started him on a new regime of 5FU. He got to do one session of that before blood tests taken for the next session showed up dehydration and low kidney function and he had to be admitted to hospital. While he was in there for 12 days he saw his oncologist who told him that the chemo had damaged his kidneys so he couldn't continue with it and it was stopped again. In mid January this year he took a very bad infection he got up one morning and was physically shaking and his blood pressure dropped rapidly. He was also just about passing out and mumbling away to himself just not making sense. I could hardly get him up off the sofa. I phoned a cancer nurse who then arranged for an ambulance to come out but hubby in all his deliriousness decided he wasn't going back to hospital. Paramedics came and took his BP which was really low and then they got him up and into the ambulance and we were `blue lighted` to the A&E. It was found out he had urosepsis a form of sepsis and because his BP was refusing to rise, they had to admit him up to High Dependency. This also resulted in him having a bilateral nephrostomy done meaning he now has to wear two bags one either side of his back to collect urine draining from his kidneys plus he has a urinary catheter.  He was readmitted to hospital again in February which we believe was the `tail end` of the sepsis infection and it seems on his notes the paramedic this time told us it was down on his report as a `failed discharge` meaning they possibly discharged him too early. He is now recovering from the after effects of sepsis. His mobility has been affected and we now have physiotherapists coming in to help get his mobility back. He hasn't been outside for weeks as we live in a main door upper flat to there is stairs he needs to get down to the front door which he is still not ready for but which they are working on.  He is really tired most of the time and has really low mood and this is all due to the sepsis. We were told he was very ill and we were lucky to get him to hospital when we did. His oncology appointments had to be changed to telephone appointments because he felt physically, he could not attend. His oncologist told him because he just came back out the hospital on 22nd February they can't even consider putting him back on any kind of chemotherapy just now because they think he will be too weak and are not ruling out and so once he thinks he may feel better and fully recovered from the sepsis (as this takes time) they will see him then. That won't be until he is able to physically leave the house of course which he is trying his hardest to work on himself and with the physios. He is `champing at the bit` to get outside again and is so frustrated by it all but the physios have told him not to try to rush things and it's a gradual process. Seems chemo damages a lot of things in the body which I have read here. Take Care. 

Vicky

Send your husband my regards and best wishes. He's certainly been through the wars. 

Chemo is certainly no easy ride, I can totally understand why some people refuse it. If my cancer does come back I'm not sure if I could go through it again.

Hi' Catdad,

You've just convinced me I've mad the right decision. I was diagnosed with Colon "C" in January. A Consultant spelled out the possible side and long term effects Chemo' can cause. So I've opted for surgery followed by Chemo' if required.

I've just had my Pre' Op last Wednesday and had three scans yesterday Saturday. My results were good. My chest and abdomen was clear and my bowel "C" hasn't grown since my first Scan in January.  So now I guess I'm just waiting for my call to go in.

Yes you've made me feel more confident I've made the right choice