Stage 4 sudden diagnosis

Hi Dave0102

Welcome to the forum . So glad you reached out . 
Sorry to hear about your dad . Some people do struggle with one of the chemotherapy drugs if they have heart issues and this has come up before but the oncologist sometimes refer for an assessment from a cardiologist and the Nice guidelines do have guidance for situations like this and I think you will find the oncologist have a lot of experience. It’s also good that Immunotherapy is a potential option .

If you click on my user name you can read my mum’s story going through a stage 4 diagnosis.  Hopefully it will give you some encouragement.

I was a couple of years older than you when my mum was diagnosed. Your dad is fortunate to have you on his team .

https://bowelcancerorguk.s3.amazonaws.com/Publications/TreatingAdvancedBowelCancer_BowelCancerUK.pdf
This booklet is quite helpful ,

Take care ,

Court 

Thank you for your reply. My dad has been told his condition is manageable but there’s no cure so he hasn’t been offered any surgery to remove the cancer. After reading your story, I honestly had to google resection as this hasn’t been mentioned. But I’m so glad to hear that no matter the diagnosis there is always a chance.

I’m hoping he can have all the treatment, but really worried about him being denied some because of his heart condition.

My mum was inoperable and given palliative chemo but a subgroup of patients respond well . It was only then surgery was mentioned after chemo . All have criteria and depending on the size and spread , there is also treatments like radio frequency ablation .

Some patients gain stability or shrinkage with Immunotherapy therapy so it’s not without hope . They sometimes use a different chemo . process might have some experience with her husband to share if they are concerned . 
They will have confronted similar situations and will have a good plan for your dad .
This is a very hard stage when they are still gathering the information . But once a plan gets put together you do feel as though something is being done .

Take care ,

Court 

Thank you so much Court. Your message gives some hope when I thought there was none. I know the doctors can’t say much, but hearing from someone who has had a family member go through similar really helps.

Dave 

Dave0102 @court tagged me thank you.   I know this is a hard time.  It’s my husband that was diagnosed in March 2019 you might want to read my profile.  My husband was 68 my children and family are so important to us and like you and your family we are all close. Their dad meant a lot to them and he still does. That support is vital.  My husband was taken off first chemo because. His heart wasn’t happy. He continued with radiotherapy and managed to get complete clinical response.  Which is no evidence of any cancer left. So hopefully your dad will continue with treatment, radiotherapy does make you tired.  My husband used to sleep a lot..this time is hard as you have such a lot to take in and a lot is in shock, I know… we talked a lot, we shared we held hope and we simply took it one day at a time, anymore was and is too much. Our path was full of twists and turns, the forum is full of people with knowledge and experiences who are willing to share.  As court says this is hard time, once a full plan in place  it will hopefully be easier. One day at a time. Take care ….Process

Hi,

honestly it was like reading exactly what’s happening to me… i’m 36 and my Dad 70 and he started feeling really tired around Christmas. He was finally diagnosed with bowel cancer which has spread to 90% of his liver in March this year. After recovering from covid, he started chemo privately last week. The oncologist said he would have 2 months without chemo and he wants to do 6 x 2 week sessions before doing another CT scan. Really scared that it will turn out it hasnt helped. Such a shock diagnosis as he had no symptoms til he started feeling exhausted and he was extremely active and physically fit for his age. I live abroad and worried that he’ll continue going downhill so rapidly. I’m currently in UK with him, but going back home on Sunday. He’s not alone as he has my mum and my siblings and nephew live nearby. But I just feel lost and close to tears all the time.

Hi

Wow our situations are more or less identical. My dad starts his chemo two weeks today. He is having Irinotecan. He couldn’t have the type of treatment that you take home and have on a pump due to his heart.

The consultant said he would have 6 months without the chemo and the chemo has an approx 1 in 3 success rate. If it’s successful then the prognosis was 18months - 2 years. 

I know exactly how you are feeling in terms of the suddenness and the upset it causes. I wish I could say I have found a way to deal with it, but it’s so hard. I’m just trying to be there as much as possible for him and trying to stay strong for the family. 

He really felt the after effects of the radiotherapy but the palliative nurse prescribed steroids and that has helped massively. The chemo sounds like it will be hard on his body but hopefully it works.

Try to stay strong, I’ve spent sometime reading stories on here and that’s helped. 

all the best

Dave

We had a good day today.. he finished first 2 week session and we got him out for lunch and he walked 3,000 steps after eating fish and chips and ice cream, albeit holding on to us. Guess it will be really up and down

Just to update. My dad was due to start chemo next week, however last night he started feeling a very sharp pain in his right hand side. After a day in ED they think it’s a perforation that has then caused an infection. He’s been admitted and is due to have a CT scan tonight.

Once again I find myself completely lost, it seems every time there’s a bit of light something else comes up. This potential perforation really scares me, you can’t help but do some reading and it doesn’t sound good.

Does anyone have any experience with perforations for those who have bowel cancer?

Hi Dave0102

It really is not possible to draw conclusions from Google over surgery as there are so many variables so please be assured of that . We have had several people in similar circumstances and the hospital have to deal with the most pressing need first  

I really feel for you as so bumps and unknowns along the way but he really is in the best place to assist him .

Hopefully he will know more later tonight .

Our helpline staff are there to chat with you too .

0808 808 0000

It is horrible and totally understand . It grips you tight in the stomach .

But they really will have a lot of experience in this .

Take care ,

Court