hiya
odd how things all of a sudden that start of as a thought go from the back of your mind to the front and become all consuming.
I have my diagnosis and my treatment plan now just waiting for my pre op assessment and op date and the type of opp I am having robotic, or keyhole,
my wobbly I am my mum sole carer, nobody else to look after her, she is 85, a full time wheelchair user with dementia she is forgetful, and it has effects her emotional and empathy part of her brain the most, she is incontinence both ways a very poor eater.
she will have to go into rest bite care, I have tried everything to see if I can keep her at home. And get cover for her. she still. loves to read and play on her iPad.
I am so worried that she will go in and not come out that her condition will deteriorate greatly thinking she has been abandoned. We are 5 yeas in on her journey I sometimes had to fight very hard to keep her as she is now, she is frail and I know that we may only have a few years left before she is lost in her own world.
I am worried she will not be looked after well, I am worried if anything goes wrong with her medically they will not react quickly, I am worried she be put in a dementia wing where she would cope, and not go into an extra care wing. Why do I worry about all this because my mums brother had all these things happen to him and I was his power of attorney I visited him 3 to 4 times a week, and still could not intervene with his care. he never recovers and got lost very quickly
I think for me this is the worst part of my illness, It could shorten, my mums time as mum and lead her into being permanently in a home.
I feel I am betraying her I promised I would always look after her.
I know I have to have tthe operation, recover look after myself, before I can look after anybody else But it weighs very heavily on me
