Update on Hubby

5 replies
112 subscribers
825 views

Well we saw the oncologist today who was very honest with us..it was a bit of a crash after our appointment with the nurse post surgery who was very upbeat and and confirmed that the cancer was out with clear margins with some node involvement..the oncologist seemed to me less positive telling us that 7 out of 22 nodes were involved and that some cancerous deposits were found in the fat they removed so he would class this as 9 lymph nodes involved which he said was significant and meant Tony was at higher risk of the cancer returning..therefore he recommends six months of chemo to reduce the risk signicantly...he didn't mention a change to the staging other than its now N2 rather than N1...I am trying to feel positive but just feel so low about these deposits in the fat and increase in node involvement...he confirmed no spread to any other organs and that he likened Tony's treatment to the surgeons removing the weeds from the garden and he putting down the weedkiller to make sure they don't come back so trying to visualise that at the minute..

court over 4 years ago

Hi ellen93

I can understand you feeling knocked , sometimes it is all overwhelming.

All I can say is surgery is still the gold standard in aiming at the cure . It has all been removed so hold onto the evidence .

The recurrence stats drop significantly after two years in bowel cancer . My mum had over ten mets removed from her liver without post op chemo with no further intervention, one met on the lung with no further chemo and despite that no recurrence in either area due to the skills of the surgeon .

It takes time to digest everything and let the news settle .

Chemo can be very powerful indeed .

Take care ,

Court

Helpline Number 0808 808 0000

Kareno62 over 4 years ago

Hi ellen93. As Court says the surgery is the main method of removing the tumour so please try and focus on the fact that your hubby is now cancer free. The chemo is the belt and braces and I too like to use the weed analogy - the tumour is a dandelion and has been dug out with lots of the soil from around it however they have found some dandelion clocks in the soil - that may be all of them but there’s a chance that some might have drifted further afield so it might be better to blast the entire area with weed killer (aka chemo) to be on the safe side.

I know that you probably feel disappointed that there is more treatment ahead but it’s worth it to know that everything possible has been done to prevent a reoccurrence and it will be over with by summer.

Take care

Karen x

Macmillan Support Line - 0808 808 00 00, 7 days a week between 8am-8pm

ellen93 over 4 years ago in reply to court

Thank you for your kind words..I am trying to shake myself up but guess I am just having a wobbly day..my hubby is feeling really positive as he was worried they wouldn't offer chemo so I'm having to try and remain as upbeat as I can..I think I might have lured myself into thinking it wasn't too bad due to the very positive vibes from the nurses and I think the non sugar coated version of the situation by the oncogist totally threw me..we had been told only 2 nodes affected by the nurse post surgery so then to be told it was seven as well as the deposits in the fat which I don't think he was going to tell me about till I asked if he thought seven nodes was a high number..he then confirmed it was and mentioned the further two..and then to hear the cancer was on the move by the amount of nodes affected and its a high risk of it returning has completely thrown me to be honest...I didn't dare ask for a new staging or if it was high grade as I didn't want any more info to dent my hubby's confidence...and to be honest I feel it would destroy at the minute...the onc just didn't radiate the positivity I was expecting...I just feel

court over 4 years ago in reply to ellen93

You will work your way through it . You are only humans and there were times I had to work hard to keep myself upright on the chair next to my mum listening to the consultants . Faces set in stone .
But it does settle and allow yourself time to process it all .

It will not be like this for ever as it really does level off after two years on the stats .

My mum’s was a different journey as her tumours were still in situ and we watch how the chemo shrank them right off the screen . It is very much a powerful tool in the treatment box .

Here anytime you need to offload.

Court

Helpline Number 0808 808 0000

ellen93 over 4 years ago in reply to ellen93

cont'd ....so scared of what lies ahead