Update

I found the key to winning any cancer battle is positivity. I wish you both the best of luck and tons of love and positivity. You got this. Hugs from ireland 

Hi Twinkles07. That sounds like good news and I’m so pleased that he has an operation planned. My pre-op assessment was a week before my surgery but hopefully you’ll get a definate date for the op soon

So lovely to read this update

Take care

Karen x

Thank you - I’m beginning to learn that positivity is the key but it’s hard as I’ve got 13 year old and 4 month old sons. Trying my hardest to stay strong for them all whilst I’m still grieving for my Mum (passed away unexpectedly March’20) and my nan & grandad who passed away in March’19 and October’20) but at least I’ve got our wedding to look forward next month. Perfect distraction. Big hugs from Essex 

Thank you Karen, I will finally breathe properly once he’s out of the surgery and recover in time for our wedding on 24.7.21 Hopefully his op will be booked by end of this month… 

I felt that it’s the news we needed to hear for now as I accept that we need to do it step by step it’s hard that we can’t plan our future but it’s not important as he’s still here, alive and fighting and am doing it by day to day. 

can I ask you did you plan your future when you first got diagnosed and where are you at the moment if you don’t mind me asking? 

debbie

Twinkles07. I think when I first got diagnosed i was in denial a bit - in fact I was drinking wine on the patio while my husband rang his family to tell them! I’d asked the consultant if they could cure me and they said they were ‘treating me with a view to cure’ which my doctor said was good. At that point I decided that I’d just get on with it then, have the treatment and get on with my life. I think in a way I’d maybe not acknowledged the seriousness of the situation and I tried to carry on life as normal as possible- going to work, Sunday lunch at my parents, walking with friends. I never considered that I might not survive - I just stuck my head in the sand and took all the treatment they offered. 
I won’t deny it messes with your head though and it’s always there in the back of your mind although it gets pushed further and further back with each clear scan. Will I ever feel 100% cured? Possibly not but worrying will not change whatever lies ahead it just spoils the present day. 
I think the biggest decision I made was to move house last year. It meant moving 65 miles away from my parents but closer to my husbands work as he was struggling with the 100+ miles a day daily commute and I did think then that you dont know what’s around the corner so, although I felt selfish leaving my parents (although my brother and family live nearby) the cancer diagnosis showed me that it can affect anyone anytime so I had to do what was best for me and my husband. 
From a practical point of view I didn’t put any worse case scenario plans in place - I don’t think my husband would have been up to it emotionally and it felt a bit negative - maybe that was a bit irresponsible? 
Anyway I am now 4.5 years clear and awaiting a colonoscopy. It was postponed due to lockdown and then the house move meant changing health authorities and then I was apparently rejected because there was too much paperwork about me that it couldn’t be attached to my case notes and was rejected! Got an appointment next Friday though so, assuming I can find the hospital, we’ll see how it goes from there.

Keep those positive vibes going - you’ll soon be able to tick off the operation box and then focus on having a lovely wedding day

Take care

Karen x

Some good news and a good plan Twinkles07

That was a tough wait for you all but they are going in to remove it . I wish you both the very best and hope it all goes smoothly .

Take care ,

Court 

First of all I’m happy to hear that you’re now in your 4th year of clear. Everything you said makes a lot of sense - agreed that it will always be back of our heads, I think everyone deals differently, but it makes me see things more clearer now and I’m going to stop over thinking things too much as I quickly learnt that it doesn’t help with my mentality and very appreciative of my family’s support and we are going to live our lives now and make the most of it, make lots of good memories but at the same time I’m fully aware there will be some bumpy rides ahead of us and makes me more determined to get through this also support my partner as much as I can. Luckily Liam has the right attitude and positivity to keep going which I respect him enormously because he is the one who’s got cancer and willing fight this no matter what for me and our boys. Currently we are living with my dad’s and I’ve decided we will stay here until we’re ready to move and get our own house without pressure and want to see how he goes first… as don’t want to rush or to add any unnecessary pressure and the main thing is our boys are settled for now so I can focus on my partner’s wellbeing for a while. 
I like to face things and tackle them also to understand more so I can support him and do it together.

I really do hope next Friday will be good news for you and get your case & paperwork sorted and more importantly to find a hospital with a good team for you! 

thank you re wedding, tomorrow we’re going to get suits measured for men, wish me good luck! As my dad and Liam wants to go with the boys without me to choose their suits I’m like no over my dead body I’m coming as I make the final decision as they will think wearing a bin bag is great!!! Ha ha.

keep us posted.

Sorry to waffle on with a long message! Xx

Thank you court - positive mind. We got this! Only 2 more weeks to go, could be worse by waiting weeks and weeks or months! 

I really do hope his surgery will be successful! And have a “mop up” Chemo then maybe it would be it for a while I hope for a very long time!

Has your mum has gone through this? I don’t know if it’s worse place to have cancer in abdominal cavity  than liver or makes no difference?