I feel like I’m drowning.

So sorry to hear of your mum’s advanced cancer.. You have an awful lot on your plate. Could you get some compassionate leave, and someone to help with the kids? Have you a partner to support you? The current restrictions on visiting due to covid are heartbreaking,.

Fir emotional support you could phone macmillan , and they can provide a listening ear fir you to offload, as well as expert advice. 

Sending hugs xxx

My boss has said they’ll do what ever we need, they have been so supportive and caring.  My husband is being a rock, but I can see he’s putting on a brave face for my sake.   I am lucky I have such a good support network around me.

I’m trying to get my head around how my mum was perfectly healthy and got called in for a screening in December, to three months later, I’m visiting her in a hospice to find out if chemo therapy is even a viable option today. And I’m angry, I’m angry that it’s been three months and still we haven’t had a single conversation with a consultant oncologist.

I thought the worse case scenario was maybe a year, and now we’re being told we may only get a month. 

, sorry you are not getting the professional support you need, with no real explanations, Does your mum have an oncologist? Not even a telephone consultation?
Glad your husband and boss are supporting you through this awful experience. 
Do keep posting.

She has a consultant surgeon. And a junior dr talked her through the chemo stuff a couple of weeks ago, but told me I was getting ahead of myself when I asked about targeted treatments. We have never had any contact from her oncology consultant. Her CEA levels have never been measured. And now the only option we have is dexamethasone to try to make her feel better for a bit. I am utterly heartbroken and angry with myself for not advocating for her better. We should have had a consultation with the lead oncologist before a surgeon went near her. We were never given the option of chemo first, nothing. 

you must not blame yourself, but Carers always do. Could you ask fir a second opinion? You should certainly be able to speak with an oncologist. Sending hugs xx