Telling kids?

Oh that’s so unfortunate. We have a helpline who would be more than happy to chat this sensitive aspect through with you .

0808 808 0000 they have loads of experience with it .

I take it it’s the older child of 14 that knows and the younger one of ten that does not ? I would be inclined to tell him some aspects . With my own nine year old child at the time we told him Gran had cells that were not working properly so the Drs were going to give her medicine , explained the process and the side effects and how it works on the cells.  She was staying with us and we were quite upfront with some aspects but at level they could process . I avoided using the term cancer as i was well aware of the whole Google aspect . My friends ten year old did that and was stumbling around from site to site  and it was really unhelpful . We were reassuring but told them to always come to us for information.

Of course nothing goes smoothly , an emergency admission where I had to take them with me to hospital blew the whole thing out the water . I forgot they could read the walls and banner over the door ! 
But the helpline staff will have plenty of advice.

Take care ,

Court 

Great advice as usual, especially the google aspect. It just freaked me that he didn’t say anything but being a teenager he’s not super chatty anyway. Will give the helpline a go and decide on the youngster. Thanks again. 

Hi EdG1969,  sorry it's not gone as you'd have liked. Here's a link and it gives info from a child's perspective too.

https://www.bupa.co.uk/health/health-insurance/bupa-cancer-promise/i-know-someone-with-cancer

When we told our grandchildren aged 9 and 11 (they live with us) we were surprised at how much they knew already. There's no right or wrong way to do it, we used the word cancer as with the nurse coming in etc and us chatting we didn't want it to come out that way. The oldest did what yours did, but a few days later asked questions. He also told us his friend at school Grandpa had cancer, so I think kids are quite open about it. The younger one had loads of questions straight away.

It will all come good, 

Love Frances xx 

Thanks Frances,

The eldest has already come round a bit. Talking normally but no questions yet. He’s got time. Thanks for the link. 

Hi

My husband has bowel cancer & have been upfront to the kids. 19, 16 & 13. We were surprised how much they had covered at school in biology about cells etc.  I think they take a lot from your own demeanor, we explained what would happen with the process of bloods, chemo & scans etc. We haven't cried in front of them at all, as we have high hopes in the treatment. I think the kids are very resilient & haven't particularly asked any questions. It was August 2020 we 1st found out, December was scary as he got covid his temp went up & ended up with 10 days in hospital. I was reassured he was in the best place. Care has been amazing. Early days I guess.

Best wishes to you on your journey xx

Good morning. 

thanks for taking the time to write. Eldest has been good, actually heard him say “he’ll worry when he knows what to worry about” wish I could have the same pragmatism. In to find out how good/bad it is on Wednesday so we’ve agreed to speak to the youngest after that. 

my very best wishes for you and your husband. 

many thanks.