Bowel cancer returned

So sorry to hear this . You’re story at the beginning sounds just like mine . I also live on my own. I question whether it would of got this far if they’d tested me earlier it makes so angry hope you’re ok I’m trying to be positive but it’s hard x best wishes 

Oh  I am so sorry to read that . It is such a horrible experience to hear cancer has returned. I can still see the look on my mum’s face . But despite it showing up a few times this is far from over. 
This is how we processed it . Subjecting yourself to the scanning process allows it to be picked up whilst it is still operable. That’s half the battle . Getting quick attention and referred to a centre of excellence is also very positive . You have also got that in place . 
Did they mention Hipec ? They kept my mum in for a full two weeks and if you don’t have anyone at home to assist I would discuss that with your team and let them know you can’t be discharged until you are able to self care . I am sure they will take really good care of you regarding that . The Basingstoke unit has a good reputation . 
My mum always talked about how she would be alright once she had found her focus . Just before surgery she would refer to getting into a “ focused “ direction. It was almost like a form of mental preparedness. Difficult to explain but that’s what I observed . 
She did have to endure further intervention  and there was no sidestepped all that came with it . But she did recover with time and she did enjoy life after that . She was realistic with her expectations but her fitness returned . She celebrated her tenth anniversary by kayaking with her grandchildren . 
We are here to support you as you navigate this . It’s a horrible feeling  but there is a good plan in place for you and a team of surgeons at the top of their game to assist you . It’s a big bump on the road to recovery but you will get there .

Any time you need to chat please get in touch . Reducing the fear is a big part of what this forum offers . Knowing others have gone through this to better outcomes really helps .

Take special care ,

Court 

Many thanks for your reply Court. It was really reassuring to hear from you. So pleased to hear that your mum has recovered well. What a strong lady she must be. I am hoping that I will do as well. I know it won't be easy but I will get through it. Like you said they are experts and know what they are doing. The Dr yesterday was really nice and he actually looked quite upset at breaking the news to me. He said so far the cancer is confined to one area on my bowel so hopefully I will be seen soon as I am really scared of my bowel becoming blocked up again. 

I have just got to be hopeful and positive. Feeling really tired today, but it's probably the shock. I am not sure how I am going to tell my parents. I have been working up to last week. 

Thanks again 

Best wishes 

Lou X 

Thanks Jaimee,

It is really hard being on your own coping with cancer diagnosis, surgery and chemotherapy. The thought of going through it again is horrible. I am trying to stay positive but I don't know how I will manage to be honest. My sister looked after me for a couple of weeks after my last surgery but she has problems of her own with her father in law being unwell and obviously covid complicates everything further. 

Yes all we can do is try to be positive. It isn't easy though. It does help having people here to talk to. 

Best wishes 

Lou X 

Hi Lou, 

Hi Gaul, how are you? 

Hi Lou, same as you, bowel cancer returned 12 months after an emergency op, stoma etc. I also live alone.

I was told yesterday over the phone by the colorectal nurse that the results of my recent CT scan had shown an aggressive return of the cancer. She listed the affected bits but in the shock of it all I can't remember what they are. 

The nurse also said that my results would go to a hospital in Birmingham with the supposed best oncology dept. in the land. Then she mentioned palliative care which pretty well confirmed what I was suspecting anyway. 

I'm talking to the walls now. I do have family support but they were running around for me last time. I have 98 year old parents living nearby and a 22 year old son studying in Stockholm. How do I tell them. 

So you're not alone. Message me if it helps. 

I am so sorry to hear this Gaul, it is a horrible shock isn't it, especially when you think you are OK. I was at work until last week. Is the hospital in Birmingham going to offer you the " hot chemo" like the one I am being referred for? Because it is a good treatment apparently and has had beneficial results. If you didn't catch everything your nurse told you I am sure she won't mind you calling her back again and she can explain in more details. I know it isn't a lot of fun being on your own in the house especially with the lockdown but I am sure your family will want to help in whatever way they can. It was difficult for me telling my parents, they are in their 80's and don't always take everything in. It is not always good to keep things to yourself, it really does help to talk about how you feel and what practical steps people can take to help you. I know it is a very scary time and covid certainly doesn't help the situation. If you want to talk to me on here please do, about anything at all, it doesn't just have to be about the cancer... 

Hi Lou - That was quick!

Our little problems are very similar. My ex, my sons mother and I are good friends as long as there’s a couple of hundred miles between us and she is going to call the nurse to get her own interpretation of everything (with my blessing) today.

I'm retired (73) but I do a bit of private hire driving. I feel well enough to pick a seven year old from school tomorrow but am wondering when that will have to stop.

Leading up to my op in Sept 19 I lost my appetite. I’ve never got it back ( can’t cook for toffee which doesn’t help) but now I’m really struggling to keep weight on. But no problem drinking - tea, coffee, wine.....

The scary bit that you mention is, is this curtains for me and if so what happens between now and then? That’s the scary bit. I have around a dozen long-time friends scattered around the World and I WhatsApp them in some depth That helps a lot.

Writing to you, a stranger in a similar predicament also helps. So does my old Irish Terrier, asleep at my feet, snoring gently. She seems to know I’m in a bit of strife.

Tomorrow morning I’m going for a walk with my brother and his partner to mull over, well, pretty well everything. This evening will be telly until about 8pm, bed and up again at 6am to take Bj for walk (by torchlight). I’ve always been a lark.

Just rambling on to you here has been therapeutic, thankyou. 
I return your offer to talk about anything you like.

Hi 

I think it’s so hard to pick everything up on the phone . My mum struggled the other week too and she has been navigating this for 11 years .

Palliative care sounds scary but is really an umbrella term for patients that despite not being curative are very much treatable and that could be for a long time . They will just never say “ cured” . Some bowel cancer patients actually do well despite a spread although it does involve treatment , interventions and lots of scanning . My mum has had a spread twice to her liver and once to her lung and is still doing well over 11 years . She still comes under the term palliative on paper . A true chronic condition . 
So sorry you have had this news and delivery . Hope you get a better picture soon and a treatment plan .

Take special care ,

Court